Inexhaustible Joy
I just had another realization. I realized that I'm not yet ready for a relationship yet. Not in the near future. I know this because something happens when I become involved in a relationship. The last time I had a girlfriend, she became my god. I realized that when I am in a relationship, I cannot help but put her on a pedestal.
I ran a search in the Internet for that particular idiom and I came up with this:
Idiom: put someone on a pedestal (place someone on a pedestal)
Meaning: To admire or revere them extremely; to idolize them.
So there. The last time I was in a relationship, I tried so hard to give her my time, energy and effort that I never had room for anybody else in my life. Most especially God. This time, I'd want it the other way around. I mean, to some people it just doesn't make any sense but I readily surrender that part of me to my Lord. This time, I'd want to have a relationship with Him so much that I'll forget that I ever wanted to find a partner in this makeshift Eden we call life. I spent the better part of my life trying to find "Ms. Right" but I've only managed to scar and traumatize myself in the process. And when I decided to finally seek God with all my heart, He readily welcomed me with open arms, covering me with a love that can only be as high as the heavens.
Whatever God's plan is for me, I can only say that it is for the best and that he wants to bless me so much. Jeremiah 29:11 by itself can attest to that. For now, all I want to concentrate on is God. I will be waiting for His leading and His promise.
I would like to share something that I recently read.
"We should, to begin with, think that God leads a very interesting life, and that he is full of joy. Undoubtedly he is the most joyous being in the universe. The abundance of his love and generosity is inseperable from his infinite joy. All of the good and beautiful things from which we occasionally drink tiny droplets of soul-exhilarating joy, God continuously experiences in all their breadth and depth...We are enraptured by a well-done movie sequence or by a few bars from an opera or lines from a poem. We treasure our great experiences for a lifetime, and we may have very few of them. But he is simply one great inexhaustible and eternal experience of all that is good and true and beautiful and right." (The Divine Conspiracy: Rediscovering Our Hidden Life with God)
If God wants me to forgo having an earthly relationship so that I can even get a glimpse of His inexhaustible and eternal joy, then let's get this show on the road.
Lord, I am Yours all of my days.
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
A Question for the Ages
A Question for the Ages
Our generation has abandoned the idea of solitude and it has done so either
willingly or absent-mindedly. And along with its expiration, more is lost between the lines. The mind of modern man has subscribed to the idea that greater activity is tantamount to an equal amount of productivity. Sadly, this connotation has never been farther from the truth.
We currently live in a world that is chockfull of distractions. Left and right, we seemingly run into the latest fad that is sweeping Metro Manila by storm or we anticipate the forthcoming week because a good movie that stars the man or woman of our dreams will be coming out. As a species, man can never be content with what he has. And I wonder if it is simply because we long for a life that we know should exist in; that we long for a life that in our heart of hearts look for but can never attain in this physical and fallen existence. And as if being trapped in an upright crucible, we are all going down--faster than we know. We are all bound to slip into that state of physical slumber when our bodies will no longer feel the warmth it once felt nor will our eyes ever see the light of day. You incessantly toil and labor for the upcoming promotion or the next big job opportunity.
What then?
You work your way to become the top professional in your company and command the respect of all of your peers as well as your superiors. All of the people in your company would be gravely out of line if he or she did not know your name as you now have skyrocketed to unprecedented fame and status.
What then?
You find your mate and end up having the marriage that you've always dreamed of---maybe even more. You make a family and lavishly shower them with gifts and love as you provide for their daily needs. If you're fortunate enough, the word 'dysfunctional' will never be used in the same sentence with your family.
What then?
You will grow old and retire real early to enjoy an age of abundance that will see you living off your businesses' profits. You'd never have to worry about not having enough money because you've become such a success at what you do. You live like this for the remainder of your life until you encounter that last gasp. You pass away, shift states, throw in the towel, shuffle off from existence. You die.
What then? Seriously. What then?
Have you ever thought of where you were going after you're through with this makeshift Eden? And you think to yourself, maybe there is no life after death. "Maybe you just stop existing", you whisper in quiet thought.
Haven't you ever wished that time would stop at a particular moment just for the reason that you said to yourself, "This is the life."?
If you've ever been to the island of Boracay and if you've ever set foot on its trademark white sand, you'll probably know the feeling that I'm describing. If you've ever set foot on the apex of a mountatin top and stood high amongst the clouds and the lush greens all around you, you probably know the feeling. If you've ever felt loved by a close friend so unconditionally and knew that even if you blew it, nothing would ever change, you'd probably understand the rush that I'm talking about. Basking in the sun, marveling and looking down upon creation, feeling the sincere love of another friend, you say to yourself: "This is the life."
Have you ever asked how you got to that conclusion? Have you ever sincerely asked yourself, why you were able to say those words?
Our souls long for something more than the everyday clutter that we see on our office desks. Our souls are not meant to stare at a computer day in and day out for the rest of our lives. The human soul longs for that paradise that it has lost. It longs to be in that grandiose Eden and say, "This is the life." The whispers of this world reverberate when we are still, when we are quiet enough to listen to it. When we rest on that pristine beach, when we gaze upon the sunset sky and all its colors, when we rest in the safe arms of love---this is when we know something is right. It is when we know that there is a life out there that we used to know because we know in our heart of hearts what life should be.
Do you know what will happen to you at the end of your life? Do you know where you will go? Honestly now. There is a road that leads to the life that we know we're supposed to experience.I know of only One way. One truth to this ineffable question. One life which we are all invited to participate in.
Ask yourself. Do you really know where you are going?
Our generation has abandoned the idea of solitude and it has done so either
willingly or absent-mindedly. And along with its expiration, more is lost between the lines. The mind of modern man has subscribed to the idea that greater activity is tantamount to an equal amount of productivity. Sadly, this connotation has never been farther from the truth.
We currently live in a world that is chockfull of distractions. Left and right, we seemingly run into the latest fad that is sweeping Metro Manila by storm or we anticipate the forthcoming week because a good movie that stars the man or woman of our dreams will be coming out. As a species, man can never be content with what he has. And I wonder if it is simply because we long for a life that we know should exist in; that we long for a life that in our heart of hearts look for but can never attain in this physical and fallen existence. And as if being trapped in an upright crucible, we are all going down--faster than we know. We are all bound to slip into that state of physical slumber when our bodies will no longer feel the warmth it once felt nor will our eyes ever see the light of day. You incessantly toil and labor for the upcoming promotion or the next big job opportunity.
What then?
You work your way to become the top professional in your company and command the respect of all of your peers as well as your superiors. All of the people in your company would be gravely out of line if he or she did not know your name as you now have skyrocketed to unprecedented fame and status.
What then?
You find your mate and end up having the marriage that you've always dreamed of---maybe even more. You make a family and lavishly shower them with gifts and love as you provide for their daily needs. If you're fortunate enough, the word 'dysfunctional' will never be used in the same sentence with your family.
What then?
You will grow old and retire real early to enjoy an age of abundance that will see you living off your businesses' profits. You'd never have to worry about not having enough money because you've become such a success at what you do. You live like this for the remainder of your life until you encounter that last gasp. You pass away, shift states, throw in the towel, shuffle off from existence. You die.
What then? Seriously. What then?
Have you ever thought of where you were going after you're through with this makeshift Eden? And you think to yourself, maybe there is no life after death. "Maybe you just stop existing", you whisper in quiet thought.
Haven't you ever wished that time would stop at a particular moment just for the reason that you said to yourself, "This is the life."?
If you've ever been to the island of Boracay and if you've ever set foot on its trademark white sand, you'll probably know the feeling that I'm describing. If you've ever set foot on the apex of a mountatin top and stood high amongst the clouds and the lush greens all around you, you probably know the feeling. If you've ever felt loved by a close friend so unconditionally and knew that even if you blew it, nothing would ever change, you'd probably understand the rush that I'm talking about. Basking in the sun, marveling and looking down upon creation, feeling the sincere love of another friend, you say to yourself: "This is the life."
Have you ever asked how you got to that conclusion? Have you ever sincerely asked yourself, why you were able to say those words?
Our souls long for something more than the everyday clutter that we see on our office desks. Our souls are not meant to stare at a computer day in and day out for the rest of our lives. The human soul longs for that paradise that it has lost. It longs to be in that grandiose Eden and say, "This is the life." The whispers of this world reverberate when we are still, when we are quiet enough to listen to it. When we rest on that pristine beach, when we gaze upon the sunset sky and all its colors, when we rest in the safe arms of love---this is when we know something is right. It is when we know that there is a life out there that we used to know because we know in our heart of hearts what life should be.
Do you know what will happen to you at the end of your life? Do you know where you will go? Honestly now. There is a road that leads to the life that we know we're supposed to experience.I know of only One way. One truth to this ineffable question. One life which we are all invited to participate in.
Ask yourself. Do you really know where you are going?
Monday, November 14, 2005
Photoshop, I like.
Photoshop, I like
I've recently discovered that I just love Adobe Photoshop. It's just an awesome, awesome program and you could literally have me sit for a day just experimenting on the several effects that you can achieve with the program. I just love (geek alert) switching saturations and experimenting with the hues and different blending modes that are at my disposal. During the course of my experience with Photoshop, I've only learned a fraction of the program but knowing the simple fundamentals of selection and saturation has taken me a long way. I just have one problem. I sometimes can't replicate a certain effect that I did, especially if it entailed me just sitting and playing around with levels and curves. Add plugins to the equation and I'm already lost. :|
I think I just need to take down notes. Oh well. *opens Photoshop*
I've recently discovered that I just love Adobe Photoshop. It's just an awesome, awesome program and you could literally have me sit for a day just experimenting on the several effects that you can achieve with the program. I just love (geek alert) switching saturations and experimenting with the hues and different blending modes that are at my disposal. During the course of my experience with Photoshop, I've only learned a fraction of the program but knowing the simple fundamentals of selection and saturation has taken me a long way. I just have one problem. I sometimes can't replicate a certain effect that I did, especially if it entailed me just sitting and playing around with levels and curves. Add plugins to the equation and I'm already lost. :|
I think I just need to take down notes. Oh well. *opens Photoshop*
Monday, November 07, 2005
On Obedience
On Obedience
"And without faith it is impossible to please God,
because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists
and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6 (NIV)
Obedience never comes easy. And at times, it is accompanied by an immense pain because more often than not, we let go of something before we let God. As painful as it is, when we DO obey, God rewards us for that. There are times that we do not absolutely comprehend what could come out of something so painful but I have been so blessed to have met new friends over the course of the past month.
I had a dilemma a few months back because I was troubled because I was attracted to someone and I couldn't think about anything or anyone else other than her. It became such a distraction for me that I went through so much pain and I cried a lot of tears just asking God if He could will it for me to pursue her. But God declined. It was so clear to me that it was not yet time for me to handle such things. And at one timely evening, I cried out to God, finally bringing "her" to the altar. That night, I totally surrendered her to God. And it hurt because it meant that if God wills that we never be together, then I have to surrender to that fact.
More than anything, God is faithful. He quickly turned my mourning in dancing and He gave me new friends to help me realize that if he asks you to lay down something, it is because He wants to bless you in ways you can only imagine. We just have to trust in His sovereign plan. Because I chose Him, He blessed me with the people you now see below. I have been blessed to have known you all and am excited to get to know each and every one of you more.
Whoever said God doesn't reward obedience? These people who I now call friends are more than rewards. They are literally blessings and tangible reminders to our souls that God is real and that He forever blesses those who seek and obey Him. It may come in some other form or another but ultimately, God will always be there to bless you beyond your imagination if we simply let Him.
"And without faith it is impossible to please God,
because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists
and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6 (NIV)
Obedience never comes easy. And at times, it is accompanied by an immense pain because more often than not, we let go of something before we let God. As painful as it is, when we DO obey, God rewards us for that. There are times that we do not absolutely comprehend what could come out of something so painful but I have been so blessed to have met new friends over the course of the past month.
I had a dilemma a few months back because I was troubled because I was attracted to someone and I couldn't think about anything or anyone else other than her. It became such a distraction for me that I went through so much pain and I cried a lot of tears just asking God if He could will it for me to pursue her. But God declined. It was so clear to me that it was not yet time for me to handle such things. And at one timely evening, I cried out to God, finally bringing "her" to the altar. That night, I totally surrendered her to God. And it hurt because it meant that if God wills that we never be together, then I have to surrender to that fact.
More than anything, God is faithful. He quickly turned my mourning in dancing and He gave me new friends to help me realize that if he asks you to lay down something, it is because He wants to bless you in ways you can only imagine. We just have to trust in His sovereign plan. Because I chose Him, He blessed me with the people you now see below. I have been blessed to have known you all and am excited to get to know each and every one of you more.
Whoever said God doesn't reward obedience? These people who I now call friends are more than rewards. They are literally blessings and tangible reminders to our souls that God is real and that He forever blesses those who seek and obey Him. It may come in some other form or another but ultimately, God will always be there to bless you beyond your imagination if we simply let Him.
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
When We've Missed a Step or Two
When We've Missed a Step or Two
"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart,
and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."
Reading the quote above just made me simply shake my head as if to say, "How true". And the most recent events in my life are a testament to how good and faithful God is, even when we don't deserve it.
A few months back, there was a falling between my bestfriend and myself. It was not because of any misunderstanding or because he found new friends to hang out with. It was because he entered into a relationship. *awww* Hence, the regular meetings were then replaced with the normal text messages that spoke of dinner outs with the girl's family and the typical monthsary celebrations he had planned for them. Although I did understand his situation, that never changed how sad I was to "lose a friend" to a relationship. And it really is true when you do focus yourself on a romantic relationship, the rest of your life will have to take a back seat. After all, this is your potential spouse you're talking about. So anyway, I was there befuddled about what to do and wondering if I could still find such a good friend.
Guess what? You know Psalm 37:4? It really is true. "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." At that time, I couldn't foresee any of His plans to bless me with such good and sincere friends. All I wanted to do was to serve Him through my different ministries and now He has given me godly people to surround me with. They're not perfect, but they're a work in progress and that's what I love about them. :) You see through their lives and their stories that God is constantly working in their lives to mold them for His glory. One of my music ministry friends talked about having a burden to reach out through mission trips to share the gospel to other people while another speaks about God's faithfulness and love each and every time of prayer.
And just now, I've had the privilege of meeting several new people who have been such great blessings in my life. There's this one particular person who I have had the joy of getting to know. And when I think of how good she has been to me, even if I absolutely don't deserve it, I just can't help but remember how gracious our God is. I am speechless and I just can't think of words of how and why God has blessed me with such an awesome and sincere friend. To be given an opportunity to get to know someone who is as wonderful as her is certainly one of the primal joys that one can ever experience. I, for one, have reached that point that all I could do was smile and thank God in my heart for His wonderful blessings. I honestly had no other words for that one moment when both of us were talking in YM---just the gratefulness in my heart and the absolute joy that came with it. I couldn't help but say to her, "believe me you are more than what you think you are. as in blessing ka sobra. when I remember you, I remember how good God is."
"So blessed, I can't contain it. So much I gotta give it away."
The quotation at the beginning of this entry is so true for me. Yet I am compelled to write my own version of it. Call it cheesy, but it comes from the heart.
"A friend is someone who knows how to dance to the beat of your heart, and can keep you in rhythm when you've missed a step or two."
There are times that we sometimes forget that our lives are supposed to be glorious and abundant. (John 10:10) There will be times when we fall down our saddles and it may seem that it would be such a daunting task to get up and try again. Friends come in and out of our lives as easily as the seasons change but there are those people--those anointed souls--who simply just light up our lives like anything we've ever imagined. Because of their innate goodness and outspoken beauty, the truth of a good and faithful God is all the more revealed. Romans 1:20 becomes all the more real when I meet friends like her. When you realize the people around you are blessings, you will be without excuse and in my case, I can only come to God in all humility and gratefulness.
You know who you are. Thank you for reminding me of what a good God we have. :)
"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart,
and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."
Reading the quote above just made me simply shake my head as if to say, "How true". And the most recent events in my life are a testament to how good and faithful God is, even when we don't deserve it.
A few months back, there was a falling between my bestfriend and myself. It was not because of any misunderstanding or because he found new friends to hang out with. It was because he entered into a relationship. *awww* Hence, the regular meetings were then replaced with the normal text messages that spoke of dinner outs with the girl's family and the typical monthsary celebrations he had planned for them. Although I did understand his situation, that never changed how sad I was to "lose a friend" to a relationship. And it really is true when you do focus yourself on a romantic relationship, the rest of your life will have to take a back seat. After all, this is your potential spouse you're talking about. So anyway, I was there befuddled about what to do and wondering if I could still find such a good friend.
Guess what? You know Psalm 37:4? It really is true. "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." At that time, I couldn't foresee any of His plans to bless me with such good and sincere friends. All I wanted to do was to serve Him through my different ministries and now He has given me godly people to surround me with. They're not perfect, but they're a work in progress and that's what I love about them. :) You see through their lives and their stories that God is constantly working in their lives to mold them for His glory. One of my music ministry friends talked about having a burden to reach out through mission trips to share the gospel to other people while another speaks about God's faithfulness and love each and every time of prayer.
And just now, I've had the privilege of meeting several new people who have been such great blessings in my life. There's this one particular person who I have had the joy of getting to know. And when I think of how good she has been to me, even if I absolutely don't deserve it, I just can't help but remember how gracious our God is. I am speechless and I just can't think of words of how and why God has blessed me with such an awesome and sincere friend. To be given an opportunity to get to know someone who is as wonderful as her is certainly one of the primal joys that one can ever experience. I, for one, have reached that point that all I could do was smile and thank God in my heart for His wonderful blessings. I honestly had no other words for that one moment when both of us were talking in YM---just the gratefulness in my heart and the absolute joy that came with it. I couldn't help but say to her, "believe me you are more than what you think you are. as in blessing ka sobra. when I remember you, I remember how good God is."
"So blessed, I can't contain it. So much I gotta give it away."
The quotation at the beginning of this entry is so true for me. Yet I am compelled to write my own version of it. Call it cheesy, but it comes from the heart.
"A friend is someone who knows how to dance to the beat of your heart, and can keep you in rhythm when you've missed a step or two."
There are times that we sometimes forget that our lives are supposed to be glorious and abundant. (John 10:10) There will be times when we fall down our saddles and it may seem that it would be such a daunting task to get up and try again. Friends come in and out of our lives as easily as the seasons change but there are those people--those anointed souls--who simply just light up our lives like anything we've ever imagined. Because of their innate goodness and outspoken beauty, the truth of a good and faithful God is all the more revealed. Romans 1:20 becomes all the more real when I meet friends like her. When you realize the people around you are blessings, you will be without excuse and in my case, I can only come to God in all humility and gratefulness.
You know who you are. Thank you for reminding me of what a good God we have. :)
Thursday, October 13, 2005
An Epiphany about Women
An Epiphany about Women
I just realized something. And I just want to be able to share it because it came during my long prayer time around 1:00 AM in the morning.
I came to discover the beauty that women inherently contain. I realized that when I see "her", it's as if I could stop and gaze upon her for a very long time. I was talking to God when I came to the topic of my God's Best. I confessed to Him that whenever I see her in all her beauty, I simply cannot help but want to see her. I could look at her face a thousand times over and not be the least bit dulled for she is beautiful. She is, in a word, captivating.
And I realize that this is true for all women. Whether you are more like this and less like that, whatever you may be, there will always be a guy who will always find you beautiful. And for her, I am that guy. I shake my head when she smiles at me or whenever she looks my way. I try to hide my joy and contentment in being near her between laughter and comfortable smiles--or sometimes, uncomfortable silences. Whatever it is, I find myself either dancing inside or shaking my head while saying to myself, "Grabe, why did she have to be so beautiful?" And this is not just physical beauty that I am talking about. No siree! It is a given that she is physically beautiful but whatever grace she has, however enchanting everything about her may be, she is still even more inside. How do I know that? I guess I just do.
So here I was, praying to God and asking Him for His will when I realized that I should be grateful for God that He made Adam strong and Eve captivating. I thank God that he made us differently. I realized that the beauty that we behold in women today are only glimpses of the beauty of Almight God. I pictured myself standing amidst the multitide while in His throneroom. I see myself hiding behind the marble pillar that is in the room--trying to get a glimpse of the splendor and beauty of of a beautiful and enchanting God. In the same way that I cannot help but become drawn to her when I am in her presence, I can only surmise that it will happen to me again with God in Heaven.
And when the Lord of the Universe calls me to His presence, it will be more than butterflies in my stomach (assuming I still have one when that happens) but it will be a rejoicing of my soul. What a wonderful day that will be.
I just realized something. And I just want to be able to share it because it came during my long prayer time around 1:00 AM in the morning.
I came to discover the beauty that women inherently contain. I realized that when I see "her", it's as if I could stop and gaze upon her for a very long time. I was talking to God when I came to the topic of my God's Best. I confessed to Him that whenever I see her in all her beauty, I simply cannot help but want to see her. I could look at her face a thousand times over and not be the least bit dulled for she is beautiful. She is, in a word, captivating.
And I realize that this is true for all women. Whether you are more like this and less like that, whatever you may be, there will always be a guy who will always find you beautiful. And for her, I am that guy. I shake my head when she smiles at me or whenever she looks my way. I try to hide my joy and contentment in being near her between laughter and comfortable smiles--or sometimes, uncomfortable silences. Whatever it is, I find myself either dancing inside or shaking my head while saying to myself, "Grabe, why did she have to be so beautiful?" And this is not just physical beauty that I am talking about. No siree! It is a given that she is physically beautiful but whatever grace she has, however enchanting everything about her may be, she is still even more inside. How do I know that? I guess I just do.
So here I was, praying to God and asking Him for His will when I realized that I should be grateful for God that He made Adam strong and Eve captivating. I thank God that he made us differently. I realized that the beauty that we behold in women today are only glimpses of the beauty of Almight God. I pictured myself standing amidst the multitide while in His throneroom. I see myself hiding behind the marble pillar that is in the room--trying to get a glimpse of the splendor and beauty of of a beautiful and enchanting God. In the same way that I cannot help but become drawn to her when I am in her presence, I can only surmise that it will happen to me again with God in Heaven.
And when the Lord of the Universe calls me to His presence, it will be more than butterflies in my stomach (assuming I still have one when that happens) but it will be a rejoicing of my soul. What a wonderful day that will be.
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
It Isn't Much, But It's From the Heart
It Isn't Much, But It's From the Heart
I used to be so troubled by thoughts of the unknown. I used to be so caught up in the idea that a relationship is all that matters in this world. Yet God has taught me to fully rely on Him. Whatever the outcome is, I know I can rest my heart on His. No matter how wounded or scarred my soul is, it will always find comfort in Him. The reason why I say this is not to highlight the negative possibilities that may happen in the future but to emphasize that no matter how disappointing human relationships will be, we will always have a perfect God who will always perfectly love us in the way we want to be loved.
And since we're on the topic of relationships, I might as well share what I managed to write in an hour. I can only say that I stand in awe in the wonder of God's most beautiful creation--and that is woman. The proverbial Eve of every man. For every woman, you will always have someone who will find you captivating and enthralling. And it is my desire for my lady friends that you find someone who will confess to you the beauty that you do not know you hold. It is my desire that you find your God's Best and that he finds you as well. Wait on the Lord because His timing is perfect.
An Ode to Eve
by Zeus Martinez
Past your gleaming eyes and limpid stare
Past the silky strands of your flowing hair
I find your beauty in quiet wait
A beauty, flawless in every way
Beauty that grows day by day
Neither the rustling of leaves of spring
Nor the thunderclouds that loudly ring
Might take it from your hands
Your beauty wrapped in grace divine
I find radiant, complete, sublime
Smile no more lest my soul rejoice
And it longs to hear your soft calm voice
Beloved, hear my honest plea
I dare not see us grow apart
For you are the hiccup of my heart
I see your face in songs and poems
And find your smile in morning blossoms
I sail the seas with you in mind
And as I peer into the blue
My thoughts are filled with only you
Past the imperfections you always see
Past your great melancholy
I see a beauty I wish to know
One I’ve searched for, one that’s true
One that I have found in you
I used to be so troubled by thoughts of the unknown. I used to be so caught up in the idea that a relationship is all that matters in this world. Yet God has taught me to fully rely on Him. Whatever the outcome is, I know I can rest my heart on His. No matter how wounded or scarred my soul is, it will always find comfort in Him. The reason why I say this is not to highlight the negative possibilities that may happen in the future but to emphasize that no matter how disappointing human relationships will be, we will always have a perfect God who will always perfectly love us in the way we want to be loved.
And since we're on the topic of relationships, I might as well share what I managed to write in an hour. I can only say that I stand in awe in the wonder of God's most beautiful creation--and that is woman. The proverbial Eve of every man. For every woman, you will always have someone who will find you captivating and enthralling. And it is my desire for my lady friends that you find someone who will confess to you the beauty that you do not know you hold. It is my desire that you find your God's Best and that he finds you as well. Wait on the Lord because His timing is perfect.
An Ode to Eve
by Zeus Martinez
Past your gleaming eyes and limpid stare
Past the silky strands of your flowing hair
I find your beauty in quiet wait
A beauty, flawless in every way
Beauty that grows day by day
Neither the rustling of leaves of spring
Nor the thunderclouds that loudly ring
Might take it from your hands
Your beauty wrapped in grace divine
I find radiant, complete, sublime
Smile no more lest my soul rejoice
And it longs to hear your soft calm voice
Beloved, hear my honest plea
I dare not see us grow apart
For you are the hiccup of my heart
I see your face in songs and poems
And find your smile in morning blossoms
I sail the seas with you in mind
And as I peer into the blue
My thoughts are filled with only you
Past the imperfections you always see
Past your great melancholy
I see a beauty I wish to know
One I’ve searched for, one that’s true
One that I have found in you
Monday, October 03, 2005
Knowing You More and More
Knowing You More and More
I learned another thing about God yesterday. I learned that the things we are able to accomplish are only because of God's infinite Grace and mercy. The minute we give credit to ourselves, whether it's on purpose or not, we risk God agreeing with us. In order to save space, I scripted the gist of what happened to me in the following psuedo-dialogue between myself and God:
Me: "How wonderful I have been for you, Lord. I have done this FOR you. This is my offering to you."
God: "Really now? Do you have any idea about how much I have helped you accomplish that? Do you have any idea that it is not you, but Myself working in you? Why do you then give credit where it is not due?"
Me: "I'm just so happy that I'VE been able to shed my old self."
God: "Since you put it that way, let's see YOU pull it off without my grace."
Me: "Okay :)"
This is the part where people in the audience say, "Yari ka." =))
Then I stumble with my walk with God. (malamang!)
*slowly walks back to God with my heart humbled*
Me: "Joke lang. Hindi ko pala kaya. I'm really sorry, Lord."
*sigh* It's hard to be humbled especially if God does that to you. He reminds you of your fallen nature and how insignificant you are WITHOUT Him. If you've never tried to come up to Him with a humble heart, I suggest that you do. If there's anything that you can do after you've sinned and you sincerely want to confess it to God, I suggest Psalm 51.
I learned another thing about God yesterday. I learned that the things we are able to accomplish are only because of God's infinite Grace and mercy. The minute we give credit to ourselves, whether it's on purpose or not, we risk God agreeing with us. In order to save space, I scripted the gist of what happened to me in the following psuedo-dialogue between myself and God:
Me: "How wonderful I have been for you, Lord. I have done this FOR you. This is my offering to you."
God: "Really now? Do you have any idea about how much I have helped you accomplish that? Do you have any idea that it is not you, but Myself working in you? Why do you then give credit where it is not due?"
Me: "I'm just so happy that I'VE been able to shed my old self."
God: "Since you put it that way, let's see YOU pull it off without my grace."
Me: "Okay :)"
This is the part where people in the audience say, "Yari ka." =))
Then I stumble with my walk with God. (malamang!)
*slowly walks back to God with my heart humbled*
Me: "Joke lang. Hindi ko pala kaya. I'm really sorry, Lord."
*sigh* It's hard to be humbled especially if God does that to you. He reminds you of your fallen nature and how insignificant you are WITHOUT Him. If you've never tried to come up to Him with a humble heart, I suggest that you do. If there's anything that you can do after you've sinned and you sincerely want to confess it to God, I suggest Psalm 51.
Friday, September 30, 2005
Only by His Grace
Only by His Grace
God is indeed in the business of changing lives. I stifle a wry smile when I think about my state 365 days ago. I sincerely never knew that I would have met so many new people in such a short time. I never knew that I would be actively involved in the different ministries in church. Ever. Here I was a lonely, lost and depressed soul looking for something that would matter in his life.
I always get a kick out of reminiscing the past year because who I was a year ago and who I am now are two totally different people. And I don't mean to sound cliché-ish but never in my wildest dreams did I imagine myself being part of the photo and video ministry of my church, CCF.
A year ago, not once have I attended our anniversary in Araneta Coliseum but this year, not only did I have the joy of worshiping at Araneta but I also had the privilege of documenting the event. Never did I imagine that I would get to sing and act for Jzone. (yes, I am now part of the prompters in Jzone) And yes I recently acted for a teaser video that was patterned after the CSI tv series.
I've also done several projects such as marketing collaterals for the different ministries and I've also helped out with some editing of the different videos for the upcoming retreats this sembreak. It is such a rewarding experience because not only do I get to improve and hone my skills (I meant Photoshop skills) but I also get to serve God through the different ministries I'm part of.
If you came up to me exactly a year ago and told me that I was going to do all of the things above, I'd probably scoff at you and say straight to your face that you've probably got the wrong man. I was so focused on getting by with the little precarious moments of levity that I would get from a good conversation or a simple compliment. Anything that made me feel high was my source of fuel. Anything that came close to euphoria, I held onto for dear life. When I think about it, it never really gave me the sense of security that I was looking for. Holding on to the things I thought were significant never gave me the happiness that I was looking for.
Everything that I thought to be important turned out to be an illusion.
That is, until I got reacquainted with Jesus Christ. And after that, my life was never the same again. I can tell you of things you already knew since your grade school days. I could tell you of the man whose great love for you led Him to the path of calvary and eventually to His demise so that all our sins could be forgiven: past, present and future. Yes, even the ones you're planning make. He already forgave you of that. I could get down and theoretical and give you several reasons why the Bible is more accurate and reliable than the historical manuscripts of Plato. I could do all of those things but I won't because every single one of those justifications, every single one of those valid truths pale in comparison to the changed life that I now hold in Jesus Christ.
Like the blind man who was healed by Jesus, I can only say something similar: "I was once hopeless but have now found Hope. I was once unhappy but have now found the only source of Joy. I was once helpless and weak yet now I am supplied with all the Strength I'll ever need."
I didn't find it through religion, I didn't find it through being spriritual. I found everything that changed my life in Jesus. All praise, glory and honor to my Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ for His mercies and blessings!
God is indeed in the business of changing lives. I stifle a wry smile when I think about my state 365 days ago. I sincerely never knew that I would have met so many new people in such a short time. I never knew that I would be actively involved in the different ministries in church. Ever. Here I was a lonely, lost and depressed soul looking for something that would matter in his life.
I always get a kick out of reminiscing the past year because who I was a year ago and who I am now are two totally different people. And I don't mean to sound cliché-ish but never in my wildest dreams did I imagine myself being part of the photo and video ministry of my church, CCF.
A year ago, not once have I attended our anniversary in Araneta Coliseum but this year, not only did I have the joy of worshiping at Araneta but I also had the privilege of documenting the event. Never did I imagine that I would get to sing and act for Jzone. (yes, I am now part of the prompters in Jzone) And yes I recently acted for a teaser video that was patterned after the CSI tv series.
I've also done several projects such as marketing collaterals for the different ministries and I've also helped out with some editing of the different videos for the upcoming retreats this sembreak. It is such a rewarding experience because not only do I get to improve and hone my skills (I meant Photoshop skills) but I also get to serve God through the different ministries I'm part of.
If you came up to me exactly a year ago and told me that I was going to do all of the things above, I'd probably scoff at you and say straight to your face that you've probably got the wrong man. I was so focused on getting by with the little precarious moments of levity that I would get from a good conversation or a simple compliment. Anything that made me feel high was my source of fuel. Anything that came close to euphoria, I held onto for dear life. When I think about it, it never really gave me the sense of security that I was looking for. Holding on to the things I thought were significant never gave me the happiness that I was looking for.
Everything that I thought to be important turned out to be an illusion.
That is, until I got reacquainted with Jesus Christ. And after that, my life was never the same again. I can tell you of things you already knew since your grade school days. I could tell you of the man whose great love for you led Him to the path of calvary and eventually to His demise so that all our sins could be forgiven: past, present and future. Yes, even the ones you're planning make. He already forgave you of that. I could get down and theoretical and give you several reasons why the Bible is more accurate and reliable than the historical manuscripts of Plato. I could do all of those things but I won't because every single one of those justifications, every single one of those valid truths pale in comparison to the changed life that I now hold in Jesus Christ.
Like the blind man who was healed by Jesus, I can only say something similar: "I was once hopeless but have now found Hope. I was once unhappy but have now found the only source of Joy. I was once helpless and weak yet now I am supplied with all the Strength I'll ever need."
I didn't find it through religion, I didn't find it through being spriritual. I found everything that changed my life in Jesus. All praise, glory and honor to my Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ for His mercies and blessings!
Saturday, September 24, 2005
Fab Friday
Fab Friday
Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,[a] who[b] have been called according to his purpose." It was yesterday that I witnessed this verse manifest in my life.
I woke up with such a heavy heart. I knew I was not focusing on God as much as I needed and wanted to. The past few days spoke of doubt and "what ifs". It seemed that this week, God wasn't my center. But I wanted Him to be. Recently, I have been experiencing some pressing matters of the heart. I woke up and I just felt incomplete. After I cried in prayer and surrendered all of my cares to Him, a certain sense of peace overcame me. It wasn't a fabricated kind of peace rather it was so genuine that it was inexplicable. I always loved when Philippians 4:7 would come alive in my life because I trusted in Jesus. It says, "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
Nothing can be farther from the truth.
And then when I was on my way to CCF, one of my Jzone dgroup member texted me saying that he could not see the point of living. There was so much despair and desolation in that one body of message that I couldn't help but be anxious and scared for him. After texting his discipler and my other dgroup mate, I just prayed for him. I saw him in Soulstop and he really looked like he came from a crisis. The message came and several hours passed. When we ended the discussion, he was so joyful and blessed that all of his questions were answered by God during the span of 5 hours. Amazing! When we cry out to God when we're at the end of the rope, there is nothing that He will not do to reveal Himself and His goodness to us. Praise God! (I also brought a first-timer friend and was able to share the gospel to another first-timer. Woohoo! \:D/)
After Soulstop, my friends and I went to Somethin' Fishy in Libis to eat. (yes naman, gimik! ^_^) It was a nice ending for the week to just fellowship with good friends. I also learned a lot about some of my friends and I also got some invaluable inputs for my walk with God. Truly a very blessed Friday. Thank you, Lord for everything!
Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,[a] who[b] have been called according to his purpose." It was yesterday that I witnessed this verse manifest in my life.
I woke up with such a heavy heart. I knew I was not focusing on God as much as I needed and wanted to. The past few days spoke of doubt and "what ifs". It seemed that this week, God wasn't my center. But I wanted Him to be. Recently, I have been experiencing some pressing matters of the heart. I woke up and I just felt incomplete. After I cried in prayer and surrendered all of my cares to Him, a certain sense of peace overcame me. It wasn't a fabricated kind of peace rather it was so genuine that it was inexplicable. I always loved when Philippians 4:7 would come alive in my life because I trusted in Jesus. It says, "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
Nothing can be farther from the truth.
And then when I was on my way to CCF, one of my Jzone dgroup member texted me saying that he could not see the point of living. There was so much despair and desolation in that one body of message that I couldn't help but be anxious and scared for him. After texting his discipler and my other dgroup mate, I just prayed for him. I saw him in Soulstop and he really looked like he came from a crisis. The message came and several hours passed. When we ended the discussion, he was so joyful and blessed that all of his questions were answered by God during the span of 5 hours. Amazing! When we cry out to God when we're at the end of the rope, there is nothing that He will not do to reveal Himself and His goodness to us. Praise God! (I also brought a first-timer friend and was able to share the gospel to another first-timer. Woohoo! \:D/)
After Soulstop, my friends and I went to Somethin' Fishy in Libis to eat. (yes naman, gimik! ^_^) It was a nice ending for the week to just fellowship with good friends. I also learned a lot about some of my friends and I also got some invaluable inputs for my walk with God. Truly a very blessed Friday. Thank you, Lord for everything!
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Blessed in Baguio
Blessed in Baguio
I just came from a mini-retreat in Baguio. After 2,527 days, I came back to the so-called "Most Peaceful City in the Philippines". (at least that's what I saw on the signboard on Kennon Road. ^_^
Baguio horizon at around 5:30 AM
Anyway, it was such a blast. I went with my discipler, Kuya Ryan, his sister, Rizza and the other campus missionaries. We had devotionals every night and we brainstormed on how to improve Jzone. It was simply awesome how God answered the little prayers that we asked from parking to sunshine. Everything was so timely that it could have only been orchestrated by Him. *sigh* Yes, God is in the details.
Kuya Ryan at the back and the campus missionaries ^_^
Kuya Ryan: (while driving along Session Road) "O guys, pray for parking."
10 seconds pass
Kuya Ryan: (stops beside an empty parking space and looks at us) "Pwede ba dito?" ^_^
Kuya Ryan: (while sitting at the back of the Starex) "Let's pray na hindi umulan." (we wanted to play mini-golf)
*We get to the mini-golf place with the sun absolutely nowhere in sight and then by the time we get to the 9th hole, we were already taking off our jackets because we were already sweating. After we leave the mini-golf area, it starts to drizzle. o_0
It was my first time to play mini-golf! L-)
And last but not the least, during our last day we wanted to eat at along Session Road. We just came from the market for our pasalubong shopping and decided to eat this one resto, Sizzling Plate. Knowing how cramped up that stretch can be at night, we prayed for parking again. Guess where we found an empty slot? Hahaha! Right in front of Sizzling Plate!
Only by God's grace! How wonderful to witness Him working in our midst! Praise God! :)
I just came from a mini-retreat in Baguio. After 2,527 days, I came back to the so-called "Most Peaceful City in the Philippines". (at least that's what I saw on the signboard on Kennon Road. ^_^
Baguio horizon at around 5:30 AM
Anyway, it was such a blast. I went with my discipler, Kuya Ryan, his sister, Rizza and the other campus missionaries. We had devotionals every night and we brainstormed on how to improve Jzone. It was simply awesome how God answered the little prayers that we asked from parking to sunshine. Everything was so timely that it could have only been orchestrated by Him. *sigh* Yes, God is in the details.
Kuya Ryan at the back and the campus missionaries ^_^
Kuya Ryan: (while driving along Session Road) "O guys, pray for parking."
10 seconds pass
Kuya Ryan: (stops beside an empty parking space and looks at us) "Pwede ba dito?" ^_^
Kuya Ryan: (while sitting at the back of the Starex) "Let's pray na hindi umulan." (we wanted to play mini-golf)
*We get to the mini-golf place with the sun absolutely nowhere in sight and then by the time we get to the 9th hole, we were already taking off our jackets because we were already sweating. After we leave the mini-golf area, it starts to drizzle. o_0
It was my first time to play mini-golf! L-)
And last but not the least, during our last day we wanted to eat at along Session Road. We just came from the market for our pasalubong shopping and decided to eat this one resto, Sizzling Plate. Knowing how cramped up that stretch can be at night, we prayed for parking again. Guess where we found an empty slot? Hahaha! Right in front of Sizzling Plate!
Only by God's grace! How wonderful to witness Him working in our midst! Praise God! :)
Sunday, September 11, 2005
WD4J Dance Concert
WD4J Dance Concert 2005
The show absolutely rocked.
When I was watching those 20 people dance, I was absolutely stunned. I have to admit that I love dancing (although it doesn't love me) and I also love watching people dance. Seeing them serve the Lord through through dance just blessed me so much.
WD4J stands for “We Dance For Jesus”. It's CCF's very own dance ministry that serves God and seeks to bring the message of the gospel to everybody. In the Bible, you'll see several allusions for dancing as a form of worship to God. It is associated with joy and contrasted with mourning. “You turned my mourning into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy” (Psalm 30:11) After several people gave their testimonies of how their broken lives were changed by Jesus' love, that verse literally came alive when I saw them dance.
Some of us are mostly accustomed to associating miracles to people being healed from cancer or to reports of a survivor of a plane crash. Those amazing stories pale in comparison to changed lives. After all, wouldn't your life be changed if you suddenly went from "terminally ill" to a person who has a "clean bill of health"? Would you not say it was a miracle if you survived a plane crash when two-thirds of the people onboard perished?
Words fail me now but all I know is if you are in Jesus' love, your life will never be the same again. No life is so broken that God cannot mend it. No soul is so unlovely that God cannot love it. Praise God and glory to Him alone! Thank you, Lord!!!
The show absolutely rocked.
When I was watching those 20 people dance, I was absolutely stunned. I have to admit that I love dancing (although it doesn't love me) and I also love watching people dance. Seeing them serve the Lord through through dance just blessed me so much.
WD4J stands for “We Dance For Jesus”. It's CCF's very own dance ministry that serves God and seeks to bring the message of the gospel to everybody. In the Bible, you'll see several allusions for dancing as a form of worship to God. It is associated with joy and contrasted with mourning. “You turned my mourning into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy” (Psalm 30:11) After several people gave their testimonies of how their broken lives were changed by Jesus' love, that verse literally came alive when I saw them dance.
Some of us are mostly accustomed to associating miracles to people being healed from cancer or to reports of a survivor of a plane crash. Those amazing stories pale in comparison to changed lives. After all, wouldn't your life be changed if you suddenly went from "terminally ill" to a person who has a "clean bill of health"? Would you not say it was a miracle if you survived a plane crash when two-thirds of the people onboard perished?
Words fail me now but all I know is if you are in Jesus' love, your life will never be the same again. No life is so broken that God cannot mend it. No soul is so unlovely that God cannot love it. Praise God and glory to Him alone! Thank you, Lord!!!
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
Amidst A Squall
Amidst A Squall
"As the waters cover the sea, so Your love covers me..."
Last night I cried myself to sleep listening to these lyrics. I just didn't know what was wrong. I was feeling so down and discouraged because of some things. Sometimes, I just can't help but feel so lost and homesick in this fallen world. I wonder sometimes why things are so complicated. I just pray that God takes away the restlessness that I feel right now.
There are times that I want so much to understand why things happen to me. I so desperately want to just understand why I am having these feelings. And amidst all of the confusion that I am in now, all I can do is ask God what He wants me to learn in all of this.
"Lord, if this will bring me closer to you, then I'm all for it. Let the waves come and allow the wind to beat against me, but take me through the storm."
"As the waters cover the sea, so Your love covers me..."
Last night I cried myself to sleep listening to these lyrics. I just didn't know what was wrong. I was feeling so down and discouraged because of some things. Sometimes, I just can't help but feel so lost and homesick in this fallen world. I wonder sometimes why things are so complicated. I just pray that God takes away the restlessness that I feel right now.
There are times that I want so much to understand why things happen to me. I so desperately want to just understand why I am having these feelings. And amidst all of the confusion that I am in now, all I can do is ask God what He wants me to learn in all of this.
"Lord, if this will bring me closer to you, then I'm all for it. Let the waves come and allow the wind to beat against me, but take me through the storm."
Sunday, August 28, 2005
CCF is now 21!
CCF is now 21!
We celebrated CCF's 21st Anniversary last Sunday at the Araneta Coliseum. The place was packed to the tune of about 15,000 people. I would like to describe the feeling of what it is to praise and worship the Lord in such a setting but words fail me. I caught myself smiling while singing "Days of Elijah".
Behold He comes! Riding on the clouds!
Shining like the sun! At the trumpet call
Lift your voice! It's the year of Jubilee!
And out of Zion's hill salvation comes!
Praising the Lord
It was definitely an unbelievable experience. To begin the worship service, we sang some songs. We sang for a full 45 minute stretch but it felt like it was only a minute. I realized that all of eternity will not be enough for me to declare how God good is and how grateful I am. *sigh*
Humbled in the presence of God
So much to learn about our God...we still continue with our willful ways yet He is ever-loving. Whatever perfect love you're looking for, you will ALWAYS find in Him.
Thank you, Lord!
We celebrated CCF's 21st Anniversary last Sunday at the Araneta Coliseum. The place was packed to the tune of about 15,000 people. I would like to describe the feeling of what it is to praise and worship the Lord in such a setting but words fail me. I caught myself smiling while singing "Days of Elijah".
Behold He comes! Riding on the clouds!
Shining like the sun! At the trumpet call
Lift your voice! It's the year of Jubilee!
And out of Zion's hill salvation comes!
Praising the Lord
It was definitely an unbelievable experience. To begin the worship service, we sang some songs. We sang for a full 45 minute stretch but it felt like it was only a minute. I realized that all of eternity will not be enough for me to declare how God good is and how grateful I am. *sigh*
Humbled in the presence of God
So much to learn about our God...we still continue with our willful ways yet He is ever-loving. Whatever perfect love you're looking for, you will ALWAYS find in Him.
Thank you, Lord!
Thursday, August 25, 2005
A Rare Morning
A Rare Morning
It's 5:30 in the morning and I'm wide awake. The only time I remember being like this is when I'm going to an out of town trip or something like that. Even though I've only managed to sleep for just about an hour, I'm wide awake. I had one of the most meaningful quiet times an hour ago. I guess it was because I was able to wake up and pray to God in total silence. Nothing in the background. Just me and God.
It was just simply wonderful. *sigh* I always love the promise of Jeremiah 29:13 because it holds true for me each and every time I practice it. It says, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
Grabe. I feel like I'm in love again. I wish feelings were as easily conveyed as words. For the people who've never experienced falling in love with God, you're missing a lot. And I mean that with all sincerity.
Thank you, Lord. "Hold me in your arms, never let me go. I want to spend eternity with you....I wanna be with you." - Hillsongs
It's 5:30 in the morning and I'm wide awake. The only time I remember being like this is when I'm going to an out of town trip or something like that. Even though I've only managed to sleep for just about an hour, I'm wide awake. I had one of the most meaningful quiet times an hour ago. I guess it was because I was able to wake up and pray to God in total silence. Nothing in the background. Just me and God.
It was just simply wonderful. *sigh* I always love the promise of Jeremiah 29:13 because it holds true for me each and every time I practice it. It says, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
Grabe. I feel like I'm in love again. I wish feelings were as easily conveyed as words. For the people who've never experienced falling in love with God, you're missing a lot. And I mean that with all sincerity.
Thank you, Lord. "Hold me in your arms, never let me go. I want to spend eternity with you....I wanna be with you." - Hillsongs
Friday, August 19, 2005
IMG_350D
IMG_350D
A year ago, I never thought about starting a new hobby. I never pictured myself getting into photography. But here I am, already the enthusiastic shutterbug. I didn't realize it was so much fun. Right now, I'm just so grateful to God for leading me to pursue this newfound passion. Also I thank Him for blessing me with a brand new dSLR. *sigh*
Introducing my new baby... ^_^
Not the actual cam but yes, I got the black one.
A manual never looked so good.
Our cute and cheerful Labrador who is aptly named "Bubbles"
Just some barbed wire fencing our neighbor's lot.
I once thought photography was such a simple thing but there's so much more to learn about color, ISO settings, composition, depth of field. It's still a bit daunting for me because I only learned the meaning of these terms around a month ago. It's scary getting into a new hobby but as an artist-at-heart, it's also exciting for me because it's the closest thing I can get to portraying the world around me. I would have gone into painting but I'm not good at it.
Now, I'm just trying to work my way with what I know and hopefully, I'll be able to pick up some nifty tricks of the trade from the people who have more experience in this new hobby of mine. ^_^
To God be all the glory!
A year ago, I never thought about starting a new hobby. I never pictured myself getting into photography. But here I am, already the enthusiastic shutterbug. I didn't realize it was so much fun. Right now, I'm just so grateful to God for leading me to pursue this newfound passion. Also I thank Him for blessing me with a brand new dSLR. *sigh*
Introducing my new baby... ^_^
Not the actual cam but yes, I got the black one.
A manual never looked so good.
Our cute and cheerful Labrador who is aptly named "Bubbles"
Just some barbed wire fencing our neighbor's lot.
I once thought photography was such a simple thing but there's so much more to learn about color, ISO settings, composition, depth of field. It's still a bit daunting for me because I only learned the meaning of these terms around a month ago. It's scary getting into a new hobby but as an artist-at-heart, it's also exciting for me because it's the closest thing I can get to portraying the world around me. I would have gone into painting but I'm not good at it.
Now, I'm just trying to work my way with what I know and hopefully, I'll be able to pick up some nifty tricks of the trade from the people who have more experience in this new hobby of mine. ^_^
To God be all the glory!
Sunday, August 14, 2005
A Love Letter to God
A Love Letter to God
I wrote this on June 11, 2005. It will be my first of many letters I'm sure. After 24 years of obliviously living for myself, I can't imagine how I've managed to go through life without loving my Creator this much.
Dearest Heavenly Father,
I don't really remember writing to you a letter ever. If this is indeed my first one then I want to be able to say what my heart is really wanting to say: I want to thank you for loving me first, I want to thank you for saving me from eternal separation from You. I thank You that despite my foolish ways, you still gave me a way back to Your love. Sometimes I forget how faithful You were or how great Your love is. I almost believed the lie that you wouldn't forgive me of my favorite sin. I know you remember that time because I think I almost felt you grieve over my disobedience. I am glad that You gave me the grace to come back to you like a prodigal son. You really do love me. I know that now. I am unable to say anything but thank you. I was lost but You still looked for me. And after five years, here we are together again. I never want to leave, Lord. Never again.
Your loving son,
Zeus
It is my prayer that each and every one of you who reads this may come to know the loving Father that I know, the caring God that gave everything up for me. The peace that you are looking for is only in Him.
I wrote this on June 11, 2005. It will be my first of many letters I'm sure. After 24 years of obliviously living for myself, I can't imagine how I've managed to go through life without loving my Creator this much.
Dearest Heavenly Father,
I don't really remember writing to you a letter ever. If this is indeed my first one then I want to be able to say what my heart is really wanting to say: I want to thank you for loving me first, I want to thank you for saving me from eternal separation from You. I thank You that despite my foolish ways, you still gave me a way back to Your love. Sometimes I forget how faithful You were or how great Your love is. I almost believed the lie that you wouldn't forgive me of my favorite sin. I know you remember that time because I think I almost felt you grieve over my disobedience. I am glad that You gave me the grace to come back to you like a prodigal son. You really do love me. I know that now. I am unable to say anything but thank you. I was lost but You still looked for me. And after five years, here we are together again. I never want to leave, Lord. Never again.
Your loving son,
Zeus
It is my prayer that each and every one of you who reads this may come to know the loving Father that I know, the caring God that gave everything up for me. The peace that you are looking for is only in Him.
Friday, August 12, 2005
A Generation of Wants
A Generation of Wants
Our generation (at least here in the Philippines) is a generation of wants. It's evident that we always crave for "something more". And though some arguably attribute that desire for more to our human nature, it still all boils down to choice. Of course, some people would ask, "Well, what's wrong in wanting something better for yourself?" "What's wrong in wanting a better life?"
Ah, but that's when things get twisted. The quality of life is then determined by the quantity of material things. For others, it's the quality of some things. We "long for" and "dream of" and "desire" and sometimes, even think that we "need" the things of this world. As with all addictions, we fail to realize that what we want, isn't what we need. We can think of a thousand and one excuses why we "need" something because the truth is if we want something so bad, we can actually come up with a thousand more.
The reasons behind our wants range from the logical "because-I-can-afford-it" to the shallow "because-it's-the-newest-model". We think it's justifiable that we blame it on the media and how they make you think you need something you really don't. Some may even shift the blame to the companies who deliberately strip down a phone's features just so they can release its "upgraded" version six months after. Whatever things we get our hands on, it's just simply not enough. At least according to us.
I recently upgraded from a 6210 to a 6630 a few months back. And though I appreciate the ability to shoot random photos whenever I want to, I could honestly say that if they still sold the cybersilver version of the 6210 even for the same price, I would have gotten that instead. Why? First of all, because I am a creature of habit. From a locked state, I could unlock that phone, go to the write message screen, text and send a message with that phone using my off-hand behind my back. I only replaced it because it really was in the habit of conking out whenever the battery was nudged out of place. So there. Most importantly, I realized that I was content with that phone. I didn't "need" to have any cameras attached to it nor did I have the desire to have a polyphonic ringtone instead of one that resembled a Morse code message.
The things we need to ask ourselves are:
"Do we really need to get the latest model?"
"Do we really need that much memory?"
"Do we really need to have that gadget?"
I shake my head in vain because there are times that I do succumb to that question and say, "Of course, I do!" I guess the lust for technology will always show our true colors. But if we stand fast and remind ourselves about what's important in life, we will realize that all the things we believe to be important are as fleeting as waves tossed in the ocean.
The quality of life isn't measured in gigabytes or limited edition chrome finishes but in the lives we touch, the amount of forgiveness we offer and the smiles we give away.
Our generation (at least here in the Philippines) is a generation of wants. It's evident that we always crave for "something more". And though some arguably attribute that desire for more to our human nature, it still all boils down to choice. Of course, some people would ask, "Well, what's wrong in wanting something better for yourself?" "What's wrong in wanting a better life?"
Ah, but that's when things get twisted. The quality of life is then determined by the quantity of material things. For others, it's the quality of some things. We "long for" and "dream of" and "desire" and sometimes, even think that we "need" the things of this world. As with all addictions, we fail to realize that what we want, isn't what we need. We can think of a thousand and one excuses why we "need" something because the truth is if we want something so bad, we can actually come up with a thousand more.
The reasons behind our wants range from the logical "because-I-can-afford-it" to the shallow "because-it's-the-newest-model". We think it's justifiable that we blame it on the media and how they make you think you need something you really don't. Some may even shift the blame to the companies who deliberately strip down a phone's features just so they can release its "upgraded" version six months after. Whatever things we get our hands on, it's just simply not enough. At least according to us.
I recently upgraded from a 6210 to a 6630 a few months back. And though I appreciate the ability to shoot random photos whenever I want to, I could honestly say that if they still sold the cybersilver version of the 6210 even for the same price, I would have gotten that instead. Why? First of all, because I am a creature of habit. From a locked state, I could unlock that phone, go to the write message screen, text and send a message with that phone using my off-hand behind my back. I only replaced it because it really was in the habit of conking out whenever the battery was nudged out of place. So there. Most importantly, I realized that I was content with that phone. I didn't "need" to have any cameras attached to it nor did I have the desire to have a polyphonic ringtone instead of one that resembled a Morse code message.
The things we need to ask ourselves are:
"Do we really need to get the latest model?"
"Do we really need that much memory?"
"Do we really need to have that gadget?"
I shake my head in vain because there are times that I do succumb to that question and say, "Of course, I do!" I guess the lust for technology will always show our true colors. But if we stand fast and remind ourselves about what's important in life, we will realize that all the things we believe to be important are as fleeting as waves tossed in the ocean.
The quality of life isn't measured in gigabytes or limited edition chrome finishes but in the lives we touch, the amount of forgiveness we offer and the smiles we give away.
Friday, August 05, 2005
I'm Back!
I'm Back!
After a long, six-week hiatus, I was finally able to play the sport that I've always loved. Last June, I sprained my ankle and ever since that day, I never got around to dribbling a basketball on a court until last Wednesday. Man, it's good to be back! It's true what they say about the things you take for granted: you never know what you've got until it's gone. Fortunately for me, basketball was just put on hold.
What made my so-called comeback better was that a lot of people came to play. It was a blessing because the regulars said most of the people who played that night weren't attending before. Fifteen players is a good, solid number for a pick-up game. First ten gets to play, then the remaining five challenges the winner of the first game.
Of course, I was a step slower and I really didn't have much "oomph" in my game because let's face it, I was rusty as heck. Also, when I jab my left foot at an angle, it hurts a wee bit. I'm just grateful that I am able to run up and down the court. Hopefully I get back into shape and improve. I guess, I need to go back and practice my game. If it took me six weeks to heal, I don't mind waiting for six months to finally improve on my game. It'll come I'm sure.
After a long, six-week hiatus, I was finally able to play the sport that I've always loved. Last June, I sprained my ankle and ever since that day, I never got around to dribbling a basketball on a court until last Wednesday. Man, it's good to be back! It's true what they say about the things you take for granted: you never know what you've got until it's gone. Fortunately for me, basketball was just put on hold.
What made my so-called comeback better was that a lot of people came to play. It was a blessing because the regulars said most of the people who played that night weren't attending before. Fifteen players is a good, solid number for a pick-up game. First ten gets to play, then the remaining five challenges the winner of the first game.
Of course, I was a step slower and I really didn't have much "oomph" in my game because let's face it, I was rusty as heck. Also, when I jab my left foot at an angle, it hurts a wee bit. I'm just grateful that I am able to run up and down the court. Hopefully I get back into shape and improve. I guess, I need to go back and practice my game. If it took me six weeks to heal, I don't mind waiting for six months to finally improve on my game. It'll come I'm sure.
The Price
The Price
This is something that I received from a friend. This just reminds me of the goodness of God. And maybe you, the reader, fail to see now the significance of what He did on the cross but He did it for YOU anyway. The love I received from Him is so inexplicably undeserved. But He never hesitated to do it for me and you.
The Price
There once was a man named George Thomas,
pastor in a small New England town. One Easter
Sunday morning he came to the Church carrying a
rusty, bent, old bird cage, and set it by the pulpit.
Eyebrows were raised and, as if in response,
Pastor Thomas began to speak..."I was walking
through town yesterday when I saw a young boy
coming toward me swinging this bird cage. On the
bottom of the cage were three little wild birds,
shivering with cold and fright. I stopped the lad and
asked, "What you got there, son?" "Just some old
birds," came the reply.
"What are you gonna do with them?" I asked.
"Take 'em home and have fun with 'em," he
answered. "I'm gonna tease 'em and pull out their
feathers to make 'em fight. I'm gonna have a real
good time"
"But you'll get tired of those birds sooner or later.
What will you do?"
"Oh, I got some cats," said the little boy. "They
like birds. I'll take 'em to them."
The pastor was silent for a moment. "How much
do you want for those birds, son?"
"Huh?? !!! Why, you don't want them birds,
mister. They're just plain old field birds. They don't
sing. They ain't even pretty!"
"How much?" the pastor asked again.
The boy sized up the pastor as if he were crazy
and said, "$10?"
The pastor reached in his pocket and took out a
ten dollar bill. He placed it in the boy's hand. In a
flash, the boy was gone.
The pastor picked up the cage and gently carried
it to the end of the alley where there was a tree
and a grassy spot. Setting the cage down, he
opened the door, and by softly tapping the bars
persuaded the birds out, setting them free.
Well, that explained the empty bird cage on the
pulpit, and then the pastor began to tell this story.
One day Satan and Jesus were having a
conversation.
Satan had just come from the Garden of Eden,
and he was gloating and boasting. "Yes, sir, I just
caught the world full of people down there. Set them
a trap, used bait I knew they couldn't resist. Got 'em all!"
"What are you going to do with them?" Jesus
asked.
Satan replied, "Oh, I'm gonna have fun! I'm gonna
teach them how to marry and divorce each other,
how to hate and abuse each other, how to drink
and smoke and curse. I'm gonna teach them how
to invent guns and bombs and kill each other. I'm
really gonna have fun!"
"And what will you do when you get done with
them?" Jesus asked.
"Oh, I'll kill 'em," Satan glared proudly.
"How much do you want for them?" Jesus asked.
"Oh, you don't want those people. They ain't no
good. Why, you'll take them and they'll just hate
you. They'll spit on you, curse you and kill you.
You don't want those people!!"
"How much?" He asked again.
Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, "All your
blood, tears and your life."
Jesus said, "DONE!"
Then He paid the price.
The pastor picked up the cage he opened the
door and he walked from the pulpit.
We were supposed to go straight to Hell yet by His grace showed on the cross, we have the choice of where our final destination will be.
This is something that I received from a friend. This just reminds me of the goodness of God. And maybe you, the reader, fail to see now the significance of what He did on the cross but He did it for YOU anyway. The love I received from Him is so inexplicably undeserved. But He never hesitated to do it for me and you.
The Price
There once was a man named George Thomas,
pastor in a small New England town. One Easter
Sunday morning he came to the Church carrying a
rusty, bent, old bird cage, and set it by the pulpit.
Eyebrows were raised and, as if in response,
Pastor Thomas began to speak..."I was walking
through town yesterday when I saw a young boy
coming toward me swinging this bird cage. On the
bottom of the cage were three little wild birds,
shivering with cold and fright. I stopped the lad and
asked, "What you got there, son?" "Just some old
birds," came the reply.
"What are you gonna do with them?" I asked.
"Take 'em home and have fun with 'em," he
answered. "I'm gonna tease 'em and pull out their
feathers to make 'em fight. I'm gonna have a real
good time"
"But you'll get tired of those birds sooner or later.
What will you do?"
"Oh, I got some cats," said the little boy. "They
like birds. I'll take 'em to them."
The pastor was silent for a moment. "How much
do you want for those birds, son?"
"Huh?? !!! Why, you don't want them birds,
mister. They're just plain old field birds. They don't
sing. They ain't even pretty!"
"How much?" the pastor asked again.
The boy sized up the pastor as if he were crazy
and said, "$10?"
The pastor reached in his pocket and took out a
ten dollar bill. He placed it in the boy's hand. In a
flash, the boy was gone.
The pastor picked up the cage and gently carried
it to the end of the alley where there was a tree
and a grassy spot. Setting the cage down, he
opened the door, and by softly tapping the bars
persuaded the birds out, setting them free.
Well, that explained the empty bird cage on the
pulpit, and then the pastor began to tell this story.
One day Satan and Jesus were having a
conversation.
Satan had just come from the Garden of Eden,
and he was gloating and boasting. "Yes, sir, I just
caught the world full of people down there. Set them
a trap, used bait I knew they couldn't resist. Got 'em all!"
"What are you going to do with them?" Jesus
asked.
Satan replied, "Oh, I'm gonna have fun! I'm gonna
teach them how to marry and divorce each other,
how to hate and abuse each other, how to drink
and smoke and curse. I'm gonna teach them how
to invent guns and bombs and kill each other. I'm
really gonna have fun!"
"And what will you do when you get done with
them?" Jesus asked.
"Oh, I'll kill 'em," Satan glared proudly.
"How much do you want for them?" Jesus asked.
"Oh, you don't want those people. They ain't no
good. Why, you'll take them and they'll just hate
you. They'll spit on you, curse you and kill you.
You don't want those people!!"
"How much?" He asked again.
Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, "All your
blood, tears and your life."
Jesus said, "DONE!"
Then He paid the price.
The pastor picked up the cage he opened the
door and he walked from the pulpit.
We were supposed to go straight to Hell yet by His grace showed on the cross, we have the choice of where our final destination will be.
