20/20 Hindsight

20/20 Hindsight

It just dawned on me earlier in the day: it's already been 5 months since I started working in YEHEY! I didn't realize time could pass by so fast. When you think about it in terms of working hours, that's a lotta time.

I can't say I really love the job. But one thing I'm certain of is I absolutely love the company. "Samahan nalang yung hindi nagpapaalis sa mga tao." We have people who have stayed in the company for over five years and they really treasure the companionship and the culture of the company. I talked to one of our MIS people and he said that one time, our director talked to them and said "Konting tiis nalang. Pag umunlad din ang YEHEY! sabay-sabay din kayong tataas ang mga sweldo." Sometimes, I can't help but think if they're just empty promises. I'm not bitter about how low my salary is because to begin with, my primary need has already been met--that is to work at a day job. After the turbulent 6 months that I spent in a call center, I can honestly say that the job was a big mistake. I lost a lot of things and opportunities back then as well as someone very dear. It would have probably been a lot different if my job didn't demand so much sacrifice. But we all learn the hard way that sometimes, the sacrifices that are demanded of us aren't optional. They become mandatory sacrifices--must dos instead of could dos.

Anyway, January 5th will be my sixth month in YEHEY! It will be the day when I will know for sure if I will become a regular employee. For now, I really don't want to expect. Maybe because part of me is wanting to look for something I really love doing. But what do I know? All I can do is write. Probably "listen" to people but nobody gets paid to do that. Wouldn't it be weird for you to get a job as someone who just listens and actively becomes interested in someone else's life? I'd probably be quite good at that.

I'm just writing whatever comes to my head right now. I'm just so lost right now although I am trying my best to find my way in the dark. It's just really sad to go through this road again alone. I once had a hand to hold when I was squinting my way through the fog and haziness but now, everything I do must be on my own. I think it's better this way. The only difference is now, I walk a little bit slower, tread a little more careful and as a consequence, listen more intently.

Hindsight is always 20/20. How true.