Clarity

Clarity

I met up with a long lost friend today. His name is Rally and he went to the United States to study and make a life and a name for himself. He said he was gone for 20 months but it seemed longer than that. We were into our catching-up-on-lost-time conversation when he casually asked a question:

"So, anong plano mo ngayon?"
I was tongue-tied.

I honestly didn't know what to say.

After hearing his stories of being in the army and having his own money to pay for the rent of their family's place and him being able to get his own car, I just wasn't able to provide an answer.

I honestly didn't know what to do. I realized that I am nowhere near the idea of settling down because with my current salary and the standing economic drought my country is in, it is absolutely out of the question that I get my own place and buy my own car.

His tale was one of independence and all I could speak of was the tragedy of "financial imprisonment" if you could call it that. Call it a lack of options but I would like to be realistic in seeing it as the unavailability of them.

Amidst the sudden realization that my situation in this country will not get any better one thought entered my mind: I had to put my trust in God. "Ipaubaya nalang natin sa Diyos." as we Filipinos would like to say. And it's true. In some ways I am more blessed than others. And for that, I am already grateful.

I don't need to have my own car because my legs are strong enough for walking. I have my health and I am grateful. As in any argument, the cynical point of view can always be countered with the faith of an optimist.

Some may call it sour-graping but no matter what people say, the proverbial glass will always be half-empty in my eyes.