The Filipino in the Workplace
I just started working at a day job. That means I wake up at 5:00 AM and I leave the office at 5:00 PM. My waking hours are Philippine hours. That also means I'm exposed to Philippine mediocrity as well.
Case in point:
10 months ago I started to worked for a U.S. company and the atmosphere back then was very strict and leniency was never a part of my supervisors' vocabulary. Each and every second was timed. Everybody knew where you were and what you were doing at any specific time of the day. Or "night", I should say.
Everything that you did was metered; everything was clockwork. And Hell would freeze over before you could even dare to disrupt the machine that they called a Schedule. Everything was done if and only if you had permission from your supervisor. Anything less than that would warrant a verbal warning or worse, a memo.
Just think about it... At a call center, you had to ask permission before you could piss or eat. It felt more like a prison than an office. Except with this type of prison, the walls are made of plastic and they seem taller than they normally are.
But I am not about to fall into a diatribe. Instead I am here to praise the people who work in a call center. I have realized that it is through hard work that you get to have a sense of dignity and importance as a person. It is through sheer force of will that you learn how to muster enough strength to come to the office everyday while suffering a migraine and high blood pressure. I now realize that what I did back then wasn't torture at all but it was work as how it should be defined, explained and practiced in real life. Back then I never understood the importance of a day's work because all I did was focus on the task at hand: satisfy the customers and make the company look good. The latter part might be too shallow for some people but looking back, I believe it should be taught to each and every Filipino employee. Because most of the time, we Filipinos are guilty of not just slacking off but outright apathy for work itself.
So now I can't really blame government for the troubles our country is facing. I may have given up that right because at my current job, it seems that people aren't giving their best. It seems that the urgency that I myself despised in my previous job is nowhere to be found here. I know it's unfair to compare the two because after all, call centers get the best people to manage the best hardware and software whereas with Filipino companies, we're just barely making ends meet by working with operating systems that are slowly being eclipsed by more streamlined ones. It is a striking contrast; nevertheless, it is true.
I don't mean to compare anything but I just know that we can all become better if we just get our act together and decide that we should be working our asses off because we're the same people who troubleshoot other people's problems thousands of miles away; we're the same people who handle the thousand dollar accounts of respected clients in 50 states; we're the same individuals who take the brunt of a customers bad attitude--and we never even flinch while we talk to them.
We are so much better when we do what we're supposed to do. But right now, we're not. I'm just wondering...is it because we're ashamed to be doing work for our fellowmen or is it because we're ashamed to be branded as "Filpinos"?
Change can happen in a man even before he is sentenced to a prison. In the same light, we can also become more than who we are now. Even if it doesn't mean having to speak a foreign language 24/7.
Thursday, July 08, 2004
Wednesday, July 07, 2004
Recollection
Recollection
I chatted with an old friend today. I couldn't help but feel relieved to know that the more things change, the more they stay the same. She was an old college friend who now lives a life that is as different as mine. We've gone through so many changes and looking back on our conversation, I couldn't disregard the genuine friendship that we still share, regardless of how little we know of each other right now. It's such a good feeling--coming back to old friends, catching up on lost time and staying connected. There's an irony to all of it, actually.
It seems that the more people have access to something, the more they are deprived from it. Just look at our traffic scheme. (Heck, even the word scheme is ironically used!) The more Filipinos had access to their very own cars, eventually, because of the worsening traffic, the Powers That Be implemented the rule that cars with a specific number on their plate could not be used on certain days.
Just as it is with cars, so is it with how people communicate today. We literally do not have any excuse not to catch up on old friends but it seems that we lose touch of them despite the advancement in technology. We could easily reach them through email or text messaging but still their name lies dormant in our online and mobile address book. And sometimes I cannot help but wonder why this is the case nowadays.
People forget about more people today than they did before. Or maybe it's just me?
I chatted with an old friend today. I couldn't help but feel relieved to know that the more things change, the more they stay the same. She was an old college friend who now lives a life that is as different as mine. We've gone through so many changes and looking back on our conversation, I couldn't disregard the genuine friendship that we still share, regardless of how little we know of each other right now. It's such a good feeling--coming back to old friends, catching up on lost time and staying connected. There's an irony to all of it, actually.
It seems that the more people have access to something, the more they are deprived from it. Just look at our traffic scheme. (Heck, even the word scheme is ironically used!) The more Filipinos had access to their very own cars, eventually, because of the worsening traffic, the Powers That Be implemented the rule that cars with a specific number on their plate could not be used on certain days.
Just as it is with cars, so is it with how people communicate today. We literally do not have any excuse not to catch up on old friends but it seems that we lose touch of them despite the advancement in technology. We could easily reach them through email or text messaging but still their name lies dormant in our online and mobile address book. And sometimes I cannot help but wonder why this is the case nowadays.
People forget about more people today than they did before. Or maybe it's just me?
Tuesday, July 06, 2004
Thank You For The Music
Thank You For The Music
Sometimes I think I complain too much. I sometimes fool myself into thinking that there is nothing else in this world except disappointment and despair. But of course, I know better. I guess sometimes I, too, forget that there are wonderful things in this world that we need to focus on, that we need to revere and enjoy and be thankful for. And today, I want to pay tribute to a quiet and constant comfort in my life. Today I pay tribute to music.
It's just so comforting to know that music will always be there to see you through the darkest of days. I've always believed that there will always be one song we can relate to when we hear it. Sometimes it even seems that we're the one who wrote the same lyrics we listening to. And sometimes it seems that when we hear this one song, we feel as if it was created just for us and for no one else. It's really a miracle in the making when we hear that one song that defines who we are and what we believe in. You simply cannot comprehend that there's this one song whose words and emotions seemed to flow from our very soul even when we've just listened to it for the very first time.
I cannot be grateful enough for this gift. And in closing, I would like to leave you, my faithful "blog-readers", the chorus to one of my dearest songs; the song that I sleep to...the song that I consider my lullaby:
In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here
Tonight, I wish each and every one of you the most peaceful of slumbers, the grandest of dreams and the fading of your fears.
Sometimes I think I complain too much. I sometimes fool myself into thinking that there is nothing else in this world except disappointment and despair. But of course, I know better. I guess sometimes I, too, forget that there are wonderful things in this world that we need to focus on, that we need to revere and enjoy and be thankful for. And today, I want to pay tribute to a quiet and constant comfort in my life. Today I pay tribute to music.
It's just so comforting to know that music will always be there to see you through the darkest of days. I've always believed that there will always be one song we can relate to when we hear it. Sometimes it even seems that we're the one who wrote the same lyrics we listening to. And sometimes it seems that when we hear this one song, we feel as if it was created just for us and for no one else. It's really a miracle in the making when we hear that one song that defines who we are and what we believe in. You simply cannot comprehend that there's this one song whose words and emotions seemed to flow from our very soul even when we've just listened to it for the very first time.
I cannot be grateful enough for this gift. And in closing, I would like to leave you, my faithful "blog-readers", the chorus to one of my dearest songs; the song that I sleep to...the song that I consider my lullaby:
In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here
Tonight, I wish each and every one of you the most peaceful of slumbers, the grandest of dreams and the fading of your fears.
Monday, July 05, 2004
I'm Sorry I Can't Be Perfect
"I'm Sorry I Can't Be Perfect..."
PERFECT
by Simple Plan
Hey dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan
And do you think I'm wasting my time
Doing things I wanna do
But it hurts when you disapprove all along
And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
Can't pretend that I'm alright
And you can't change me
Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore
And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing's alright
Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you
But you don't understand
Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
I take comfort in the knowledge that this, too, shall pass. Thank you to all of the people who support me and give me strength.
PERFECT
by Simple Plan
Hey dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan
And do you think I'm wasting my time
Doing things I wanna do
But it hurts when you disapprove all along
And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
Can't pretend that I'm alright
And you can't change me
Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore
And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing's alright
Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you
But you don't understand
Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
I take comfort in the knowledge that this, too, shall pass. Thank you to all of the people who support me and give me strength.
24 Years Later
24 Years Later
Yesterday was a different birthday for me.
When I was a teenager of 15 years, I never really thought that 9 years later I'd end up spending my special day with only two of the most special people in my life. To those two, you know who you are. And I thank you for washing away the tears that shouldn't have come and for giving me strength in that day of mixed feelings.
I should have had more than two guests but the hand of God moved and all I could do was watch. You realize that you really do not have any control over anything.
Even over a simple invitation and get-together with your closest and dearest.
A lot of things happened that day.
Some people forgot to greet me while some surprised me.
I guess the saddest part of my 24th birthday isn't the fact that I only had 2 people present out of the 6 invited guests. I am secure with the fact that those four people who couldn't come wish me well. The saddest part was probably the fact that my dad never greeted me Happy Birthday.
Not even a hug or a pat on the shoulder saying: "Ilang taon ka na?"
Absolutely no recognition.
Of course I still cried. But a lot of things made up for it.
1. Anj's chocolate cake - hands down the best chocolate cake I've tasted. EVER!
2. Jom and KV's video surprise for me. - I can't believe I've been had! :)
3. The various text messages during the day.
4. Mommy being the one to greet me first in my family.
5. My sisters and brother greeting me after getting inside the car.
It wasn't entirely happy at all. But whoever said that it was supposed to be like that anyway?
To all the people who greeted me. Thank you very much!
Yesterday was a different birthday for me.
When I was a teenager of 15 years, I never really thought that 9 years later I'd end up spending my special day with only two of the most special people in my life. To those two, you know who you are. And I thank you for washing away the tears that shouldn't have come and for giving me strength in that day of mixed feelings.
I should have had more than two guests but the hand of God moved and all I could do was watch. You realize that you really do not have any control over anything.
Even over a simple invitation and get-together with your closest and dearest.
A lot of things happened that day.
Some people forgot to greet me while some surprised me.
I guess the saddest part of my 24th birthday isn't the fact that I only had 2 people present out of the 6 invited guests. I am secure with the fact that those four people who couldn't come wish me well. The saddest part was probably the fact that my dad never greeted me Happy Birthday.
Not even a hug or a pat on the shoulder saying: "Ilang taon ka na?"
Absolutely no recognition.
Of course I still cried. But a lot of things made up for it.
1. Anj's chocolate cake - hands down the best chocolate cake I've tasted. EVER!
2. Jom and KV's video surprise for me. - I can't believe I've been had! :)
3. The various text messages during the day.
4. Mommy being the one to greet me first in my family.
5. My sisters and brother greeting me after getting inside the car.
It wasn't entirely happy at all. But whoever said that it was supposed to be like that anyway?
To all the people who greeted me. Thank you very much!
Friday, July 02, 2004
The Invisible God
A God of Inequity
Hasn’t it crossed your mind that God is unfair?
And I don’t mean that in a blasphemous or negative way. At all.
I mean think about it. We’ve forgotten Him during times of happiness when He should have been given all the credit, we’ve sinned time and again, we’ve broken our promises to Him…not only once but more times than we’d care to count. We’ve been like the ultimate spoiled problem child and He still manages to give us what we need when we need it.
If that isn’t unfair, I don’t know what is. It’s unfair to Him to be like that and let me tell you why.
We, as creatures of sin, should right now be cast into the eternal torture that is Hell and be made to suffer the most damned of punishments forever and ever. I believe we are entitled to as least that. Each and every one of us.
But God chooses to be unfair. He’s as stubborn as we can never imagine and I think He’s like that because He does it out of love.
I hate it when I remember things like this. It makes me feel all rotten inside. But it’s the good kind of rotten feeling if you can ever relate to what I’m saying right now.
We humans, as enforcers of justice have always acted in a justifiable manner. Someone pisses us off, we throw a fit. This beat-up owner cuts us off at the road, we cut the car in front of us…desperately risk life and limb to catch up with that owner, and then we cut it off as if our life depended on it. We have always had a system of justice with which we adhere to. And with some people, their system is simple: “You mess with me, and you’re gonna wish you were never born you!!!”
What’s my point again?
God is unfair.
He is so because we shouldn’t be where we are right now yet He has chosen to bless us with so many things. And more often than not, we tend to gripe about how we don’t have enough of this and that when we should realize that we have much much more than what we truly deserve.
As early as our childhood years, we’ve been brainwashed into thinking that having more of something is a measure of happiness. Haven’t you ever wondered how good it would have felt like to own a room full of He-Man action figures complete with Castle Grayskull and Cringer a.k.a. Battle Cat? It’s funny looking back at what we’ve branded as a measure of happiness, isn’t it? Or haven’t you wondered what life would be like if you couldn’t decide what’s sports car to bring to school? To some it might be food for thought; not to mention also for our dreams…but maybe we should start rethinking about what really matters in life because as far as I’m concerned, I think we’re all being set up.
By the world, by the media, by everything that is trivial. And they’re doing a spectacular job, mind you.
And when someone asks where is God in our lives amidst all of this. We sometimes cannot help but shrug and dismiss the idea.
We never deserved any of this---our life, our belongings, our blessings. But He still gave it all to us and more.
Again I ask: If that’s not being unfair, I don’t know what is.
Hasn’t it crossed your mind that God is unfair?
And I don’t mean that in a blasphemous or negative way. At all.
I mean think about it. We’ve forgotten Him during times of happiness when He should have been given all the credit, we’ve sinned time and again, we’ve broken our promises to Him…not only once but more times than we’d care to count. We’ve been like the ultimate spoiled problem child and He still manages to give us what we need when we need it.
If that isn’t unfair, I don’t know what is. It’s unfair to Him to be like that and let me tell you why.
We, as creatures of sin, should right now be cast into the eternal torture that is Hell and be made to suffer the most damned of punishments forever and ever. I believe we are entitled to as least that. Each and every one of us.
But God chooses to be unfair. He’s as stubborn as we can never imagine and I think He’s like that because He does it out of love.
I hate it when I remember things like this. It makes me feel all rotten inside. But it’s the good kind of rotten feeling if you can ever relate to what I’m saying right now.
We humans, as enforcers of justice have always acted in a justifiable manner. Someone pisses us off, we throw a fit. This beat-up owner cuts us off at the road, we cut the car in front of us…desperately risk life and limb to catch up with that owner, and then we cut it off as if our life depended on it. We have always had a system of justice with which we adhere to. And with some people, their system is simple: “You mess with me, and you’re gonna wish you were never born you
What’s my point again?
God is unfair.
He is so because we shouldn’t be where we are right now yet He has chosen to bless us with so many things. And more often than not, we tend to gripe about how we don’t have enough of this and that when we should realize that we have much much more than what we truly deserve.
As early as our childhood years, we’ve been brainwashed into thinking that having more of something is a measure of happiness. Haven’t you ever wondered how good it would have felt like to own a room full of He-Man action figures complete with Castle Grayskull and Cringer a.k.a. Battle Cat? It’s funny looking back at what we’ve branded as a measure of happiness, isn’t it? Or haven’t you wondered what life would be like if you couldn’t decide what’s sports car to bring to school? To some it might be food for thought; not to mention also for our dreams…but maybe we should start rethinking about what really matters in life because as far as I’m concerned, I think we’re all being set up.
By the world, by the media, by everything that is trivial. And they’re doing a spectacular job, mind you.
And when someone asks where is God in our lives amidst all of this. We sometimes cannot help but shrug and dismiss the idea.
We never deserved any of this---our life, our belongings, our blessings. But He still gave it all to us and more.
Again I ask: If that’s not being unfair, I don’t know what is.
Thursday, July 01, 2004
A Ray of Sunshine Amidst the Storm
A Ray of Sunshine Amidst the Storm
When I looked out the window this morning, the sky was filled with such gloom as it had been these past few days. But I think I saw the sun shine for the briefest of periods. It must be a simple reminder that there is such a thing called Hope. And I believe it comes in those brief and spontaneous moments that slip under our radar, those moments that in retrospect, leave us with a grin on our face and an unmistakable sense of peace inside our hearts. As someone simply put it:
wag mashado malungkot.. o-OK din lahat yan. you'll see.Ü
Everybody else in this world goes through what I am going through right now--their own personal storms. I would like to know that the fight is finished; that the calm afterwards is nearing. But like any seasoned sea-farer, I know how deep these waters underneath me go and how dark the skies above me can become. But if you're struggling to keep your vessel afloat in a sea of entropy , and you manage to somehow catch even a single ray of sunshine, I think that will be enough to keep you sailing onwards.
I am fortunate enough to know people who are strong enough to help me keep my ship afloat. To those people--and you know who you are--I am forever grateful.
When I looked out the window this morning, the sky was filled with such gloom as it had been these past few days. But I think I saw the sun shine for the briefest of periods. It must be a simple reminder that there is such a thing called Hope. And I believe it comes in those brief and spontaneous moments that slip under our radar, those moments that in retrospect, leave us with a grin on our face and an unmistakable sense of peace inside our hearts. As someone simply put it:
Everybody else in this world goes through what I am going through right now--their own personal storms. I would like to know that the fight is finished; that the calm afterwards is nearing. But like any seasoned sea-farer, I know how deep these waters underneath me go and how dark the skies above me can become. But if you're struggling to keep your vessel afloat in a sea of entropy , and you manage to somehow catch even a single ray of sunshine, I think that will be enough to keep you sailing onwards.
I am fortunate enough to know people who are strong enough to help me keep my ship afloat. To those people--and you know who you are--I am forever grateful.
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
That One Special Day
That One Special Day
I believe the most deplorable thing that can happen to a person is to experience helplessness. It must be similar to the feeling when you're already burning in that boiling lake of sulfur when you're already in Hell. The place of fire and brimstone.
The place I am now. Figuratively, that is.
This month has absolutely been one of the worst times in my life. It seems that I have been engulfed by the jaws of helplessness. And I feel it has swallowed me whole. Believe me when I say that it is one of the few emotions I do not wish upon anyone because it breaks people. It cripples them and consumes their hopes and dreams and buries them with it after it is through with them.
I have had regrets which I have realized too late and I cannot seem to see past them. I cannot seem to see the sliver of hope that many friends would say that I have because it almost seems too minute to be recognized. I am aware that we should never dwell on our regrets; that there is no use in crying over spilled milk because that's just how life is. C'est la vie.
I am at a point in my life right now where I wake up and I see the futility of living. I see the despair that I have to face every day and I cannot seem to stare at it in the face because I am afraid. No...I am terrified to say the least.
I am unemployed.
I am confused.
I am lost.
I am disappointed. Most especially with myself.
Sometimes I feel like a caged animal where all I see are bars in front of me. Limitations, restrictions, hopelessness. It is a desolation of sorts because I feel so disconnected from everyone else and from myself. I just wish there was a way out.
In four days, I will have stayed on this Earth for nearly a quarter of a century. And I feel that I have nothing to show for it. Just disappointed people and a thousand broken dreams and wishes that during my days of naiveté were the things that drove me to fight the good fight. Four days from now will be my birthday. Or at least that's what will some attempt to call it. For me, it will probably be just an ordinary day or maybe even a sad one. Perhaps my saddest birthday to date.
I just wish people really had one birthday wish to make on their special day. That would at least give me hope. And for me, that is all that I need right now...that will definitely suffice.
I believe the most deplorable thing that can happen to a person is to experience helplessness. It must be similar to the feeling when you're already burning in that boiling lake of sulfur when you're already in Hell. The place of fire and brimstone.
The place I am now. Figuratively, that is.
This month has absolutely been one of the worst times in my life. It seems that I have been engulfed by the jaws of helplessness. And I feel it has swallowed me whole. Believe me when I say that it is one of the few emotions I do not wish upon anyone because it breaks people. It cripples them and consumes their hopes and dreams and buries them with it after it is through with them.
I have had regrets which I have realized too late and I cannot seem to see past them. I cannot seem to see the sliver of hope that many friends would say that I have because it almost seems too minute to be recognized. I am aware that we should never dwell on our regrets; that there is no use in crying over spilled milk because that's just how life is. C'est la vie.
I am at a point in my life right now where I wake up and I see the futility of living. I see the despair that I have to face every day and I cannot seem to stare at it in the face because I am afraid. No...I am terrified to say the least.
I am unemployed.
I am confused.
I am lost.
I am disappointed. Most especially with myself.
Sometimes I feel like a caged animal where all I see are bars in front of me. Limitations, restrictions, hopelessness. It is a desolation of sorts because I feel so disconnected from everyone else and from myself. I just wish there was a way out.
In four days, I will have stayed on this Earth for nearly a quarter of a century. And I feel that I have nothing to show for it. Just disappointed people and a thousand broken dreams and wishes that during my days of naiveté were the things that drove me to fight the good fight. Four days from now will be my birthday. Or at least that's what will some attempt to call it. For me, it will probably be just an ordinary day or maybe even a sad one. Perhaps my saddest birthday to date.
I just wish people really had one birthday wish to make on their special day. That would at least give me hope. And for me, that is all that I need right now...that will definitely suffice.
Monday, June 28, 2004
In Retrospect
In Retrospect
"Regrets"
by Zeus Martinez
The way the waves of the ocean
yearn for the shore
The way the birds long for the sky
upon seeing white and blue
That is the manner I long for you.
The time it takes from here to there
and even until Neverwhere
Until the passing of earth and space
into their last and final spark
That is how long I'll wait for your heart.
Because your smile and quiet eyes
I cannot see them anymore
Because my heart aches for you
and you are no longer here with me
That is why I regret failing you...
...from here on 'til eternity.
If you ever come to a point when you find that one person to love and to cherish for life, do your best. Try to do everything for that person and treasure each and every moment. That way you'll never ever regret anything. And you'll never ever confess that you never gave your 100%.
For Nina.
"Regrets"
by Zeus Martinez
The way the waves of the ocean
yearn for the shore
The way the birds long for the sky
upon seeing white and blue
That is the manner I long for you.
The time it takes from here to there
and even until Neverwhere
Until the passing of earth and space
into their last and final spark
That is how long I'll wait for your heart.
Because your smile and quiet eyes
I cannot see them anymore
Because my heart aches for you
and you are no longer here with me
That is why I regret failing you...
...from here on 'til eternity.
If you ever come to a point when you find that one person to love and to cherish for life, do your best. Try to do everything for that person and treasure each and every moment. That way you'll never ever regret anything. And you'll never ever confess that you never gave your 100%.
For Nina.
Thursday, June 24, 2004
The Second Time Around
The Second Time Around
It has always been said that adversity brings out the best in us as well as the worst. As for me, I have no doubt been able to prove to myself that it does. But the most important lesson so far is that I have been humbled. And I believe that it is one of the most profound experiences you will have in your lifetime.
People rarely welcome adversity because it is a harbinger of change. It has not been ingrained into our systems to accept such change because it destroys our routine. It challenges our spirits. To the older people of our generation, it means leaving their so-called comfort zones.
Like all people, I have experienced a plethora of emotions ever since childhood. But I am most surprised to come to the realization that the more things change, the more they stay the same.
I have cried.
I have rejoiced.
I have been shamed.
As well as honored.
I have been angry and sorrowful.
Passive and aggressive.
Stubborn and wise.
I have been introduced to the different truths in the world and every now and then, because I forget, I once again meet their acquaintance. It is amusing that when someone is introduced to you the second time around, you never seem to forget that moment. And you always remember their name.
I was once introduced to Humility. I met him again…and I will certainly not forget his name ever again.
It has always been said that adversity brings out the best in us as well as the worst. As for me, I have no doubt been able to prove to myself that it does. But the most important lesson so far is that I have been humbled. And I believe that it is one of the most profound experiences you will have in your lifetime.
People rarely welcome adversity because it is a harbinger of change. It has not been ingrained into our systems to accept such change because it destroys our routine. It challenges our spirits. To the older people of our generation, it means leaving their so-called comfort zones.
Like all people, I have experienced a plethora of emotions ever since childhood. But I am most surprised to come to the realization that the more things change, the more they stay the same.
I have cried.
I have rejoiced.
I have been shamed.
As well as honored.
I have been angry and sorrowful.
Passive and aggressive.
Stubborn and wise.
I have been introduced to the different truths in the world and every now and then, because I forget, I once again meet their acquaintance. It is amusing that when someone is introduced to you the second time around, you never seem to forget that moment. And you always remember their name.
I was once introduced to Humility. I met him again…and I will certainly not forget his name ever again.
Sunday, June 20, 2004
Rain
Rain
I wish it would rain forever. There seems to be a certain sense of peace whenever it would rain. In my case, it offers a passing moment of security when one could just sit still and listen to the dance of a thousand and one droplets hit the ground.
It helps ease whatever worries that are troubling your mind because you know that at that particular time, something much much bigger is happening. And for one brief moment, amidst the noise around you, your worries seem to fade away in the marriage of water and earth.
I wish it would rain on and on. Then I could take comfort in knowing that given enough time I can drift to a peaceful slumber and forget about everything else.
I wish it would rain forever. There seems to be a certain sense of peace whenever it would rain. In my case, it offers a passing moment of security when one could just sit still and listen to the dance of a thousand and one droplets hit the ground.
It helps ease whatever worries that are troubling your mind because you know that at that particular time, something much much bigger is happening. And for one brief moment, amidst the noise around you, your worries seem to fade away in the marriage of water and earth.
I wish it would rain on and on. Then I could take comfort in knowing that given enough time I can drift to a peaceful slumber and forget about everything else.
The Greater Good
The Greater Good
As boring as the cliché sounds I'd have to agree that the truth hurts. Bad.
It's ironic but as adamant as we are in teaching the younger generation of the righteousness of telling the truth, we are also as nonchalant in hiding it. It is a sorrowful thing indeed but we, as adults, have mastered the art of white lies. It seems so trivial to us to just hide the truth from others, to stealthily craft story after story to cover up our after ourselves and the garbage that we leave behind. To the people who can relate, we have already given this another name--"The Greater Good".
But sometimes, you really have to hide the truth. Most of the time, it even becomes a necessity we crave for as much as we do the air we breathe. It is that warm blanket that makes everything alright in the end. A comfort zone of sorts. This is most especially true when in relationships.
I am not about to confess that I am blameless of this demerit. But I am an advocate of finding the truth. I am so because I believe that people lie too much just to feel okay. I believe the distortions of the truth have now been relegated as a way of life and not as a serious grievance on morality. People today lie about where they've been or what they've done or what their job is or what car they drive. But the most common area of fault is where people lie about how they feel.
I sometimes wonder what gives those people the capacity to do such a thing--to lie about their feelings. It's strange because after pondering such a question, you eventually come to a point in your life where you are given the answer.
The feeling is more like a pop-quiz and you're the only one who doesn't know the answer. "Time's up. Pencils down, pass your papers to the front."
And all you've managed to write down is your name and the date.
Today I already understand the so-called wisdom in putting the truth aside. I already seem to grasp the reason for the obfuscation of the real. It is because people need to think of the greater good. And there is such a thing in this world we live in. Believe me, there is. You just need to understand where people are coming from. And most especially, you also need to be thinking about what's best for them. And you'll know it. By golly, you'll damn well know it because it'll hurt like hell.
But you won't even flinch. And you might even smile.
Because the greater good will always be served when they are at their happiest.
As boring as the cliché sounds I'd have to agree that the truth hurts. Bad.
It's ironic but as adamant as we are in teaching the younger generation of the righteousness of telling the truth, we are also as nonchalant in hiding it. It is a sorrowful thing indeed but we, as adults, have mastered the art of white lies. It seems so trivial to us to just hide the truth from others, to stealthily craft story after story to cover up our after ourselves and the garbage that we leave behind. To the people who can relate, we have already given this another name--"The Greater Good".
But sometimes, you really have to hide the truth. Most of the time, it even becomes a necessity we crave for as much as we do the air we breathe. It is that warm blanket that makes everything alright in the end. A comfort zone of sorts. This is most especially true when in relationships.
I am not about to confess that I am blameless of this demerit. But I am an advocate of finding the truth. I am so because I believe that people lie too much just to feel okay. I believe the distortions of the truth have now been relegated as a way of life and not as a serious grievance on morality. People today lie about where they've been or what they've done or what their job is or what car they drive. But the most common area of fault is where people lie about how they feel.
I sometimes wonder what gives those people the capacity to do such a thing--to lie about their feelings. It's strange because after pondering such a question, you eventually come to a point in your life where you are given the answer.
The feeling is more like a pop-quiz and you're the only one who doesn't know the answer. "Time's up. Pencils down, pass your papers to the front."
And all you've managed to write down is your name and the date.
Today I already understand the so-called wisdom in putting the truth aside. I already seem to grasp the reason for the obfuscation of the real. It is because people need to think of the greater good. And there is such a thing in this world we live in. Believe me, there is. You just need to understand where people are coming from. And most especially, you also need to be thinking about what's best for them. And you'll know it. By golly, you'll damn well know it because it'll hurt like hell.
But you won't even flinch. And you might even smile.
Because the greater good will always be served when they are at their happiest.
Wednesday, June 16, 2004
The Crumbling of a Dynasty
A single signboard that was being valiantly held up in Game 4 said it all:
LAKERS HAVE SUPERMAN, PISTONS HAVE KRYPTONITE!
And now, after five games, nothing could be farther from the truth.
The dynasty that was once the Los Angeles Lakers has finally crumbled. In the Palace at Auburn Hills, all that was left for the Lakers were the remains of bruised egos, bitter memories and history in the making. Today June 16th, after five grueling games, it has finally been decided that the Detroit Pistons are better than the Los Angeles Lakers. Never mind the post-season bonuses or the championship banners or even history in the making. Now everybody in the NBA knows the Pistons are better than the Lakers. Yes, including Shaq and Kobe.
What the Detroit Pistons unraveled after Game 5 was a secret that mystified the league for the past half decade: "How do you defeat Shaq, Kobe and the Los Angeles Lakers?"
There will be no more discussions on why Shaq is the most dominant player in the league or how good Kobe is in the clutch because after all, players win as a team; they also lose as one. The Lakers forgot that. They faced a Detroit Pistons team that never complained about the calls the referees made, the shooting background of any arena or who should be getting more touches on the ball. The Los Angeles Lakers forgot how to play championship basketball. Heck, they even forgot how to play amateur ball.
"Here we are in the NBA Finals and we're talking about stuff YOU TELL JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL TEAMS: move the basketball, block out, rebound and limit your turnovers, because they're getting more points off our turnovers than anything else," Cleamons said. "It still comes back to fundamentals."
Meanwhile, on the other side of the court. The Detroit Pistons just kept revving up their engines, fighting their way through comments that they were in the Junior Varsity League of the NBA. They played through a triple overtime loss in New Jersey in the semifinals. They defended their way to victory against the Indiana Pacers who had the Best Defensive Player in their roster. They beat every single team in the NBA and they beat them bad. By the way they made NBA basketball history while they were at it too.
To paraphrase:
"Ever since the NBA adopted the 2-3-2 format in the NBA Finals, no home team has ever swept the middle three games."
These Pistons did it after 48 minutes. Today they might go into the history books as one of the most remembered teams in the history of the NBA not because of the similarity they have with the Bad Boys of old or the fact that they helped bring all sports trophies in the Motor City for this year. They will go down as the only opponents strong enough to beat a Los Angeles Lakers team that seemed to don an armor of invincibility. They will be remembered for the way that they played basketball---as a team. Nobody stood out in the series. There was no single superstar in this Detroit team, no million dollar player who would be demanding the ball each and every possession. One could even argue that Ben Wallace is the heart and soul of this team, but it would be to no avail because it would only echo as much as a whisper lost in an arena full of screaming, rabid basketball fans. No one in this Detroit team would care because all the proof that they need, they already have.
Trophy love. How sweet it is, indeed!
The Detroit Pistons have never been my favorite team until the start of the NBA Finals. I never followed them as a basketball team because after all, I, too, fell for the notion that the Eastern Conference was the JV league of the NBA. But no matter how double-faced this article may be, after their win in Game 1 it only became apparent to me that the resolve of this team is iron-clad, that their casually talked-about defense actually makes the other team turn over the ball more. And today, basketball, as a sport, has never meant more to itself because the Pistons did the great James Naismith proud. In front of the whole world, these athletes exemplified how to play basketball. And their success came as no secret.
Defend the paint. Make your shots and just play ball.
Mind-boggling as how everything turned out to be, the spirit of the team was echoed in a simple comment that will be lost in the flood of interviews and championship jubilation:
"You've got to know that you're going to be in a fight for 40 minutes. You've just got to be willing to take some blows and just stand in there and play" -Ben Wallace
Indeed, the Los Angeles Lakers had a self-proclaimed superman on their side. But even Superman had friends. This Lakers team didn’t. The Detroit Pistons showed that anything is possible as long as you have the will to accomplish it. Moreover, they also taught us that it didn’t hurt to rely on each other when the hour of proving comes. The better team won this year. Next year will be no different.
I love this game.
by Zeus A. Martinez
A single signboard that was being valiantly held up in Game 4 said it all:
LAKERS HAVE SUPERMAN, PISTONS HAVE KRYPTONITE!
And now, after five games, nothing could be farther from the truth.
The dynasty that was once the Los Angeles Lakers has finally crumbled. In the Palace at Auburn Hills, all that was left for the Lakers were the remains of bruised egos, bitter memories and history in the making. Today June 16th, after five grueling games, it has finally been decided that the Detroit Pistons are better than the Los Angeles Lakers. Never mind the post-season bonuses or the championship banners or even history in the making. Now everybody in the NBA knows the Pistons are better than the Lakers. Yes, including Shaq and Kobe.
What the Detroit Pistons unraveled after Game 5 was a secret that mystified the league for the past half decade: "How do you defeat Shaq, Kobe and the Los Angeles Lakers?"
There will be no more discussions on why Shaq is the most dominant player in the league or how good Kobe is in the clutch because after all, players win as a team; they also lose as one. The Lakers forgot that. They faced a Detroit Pistons team that never complained about the calls the referees made, the shooting background of any arena or who should be getting more touches on the ball. The Los Angeles Lakers forgot how to play championship basketball. Heck, they even forgot how to play amateur ball.
"Here we are in the NBA Finals and we're talking about stuff YOU TELL JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL TEAMS: move the basketball, block out, rebound and limit your turnovers, because they're getting more points off our turnovers than anything else," Cleamons said. "It still comes back to fundamentals."
Meanwhile, on the other side of the court. The Detroit Pistons just kept revving up their engines, fighting their way through comments that they were in the Junior Varsity League of the NBA. They played through a triple overtime loss in New Jersey in the semifinals. They defended their way to victory against the Indiana Pacers who had the Best Defensive Player in their roster. They beat every single team in the NBA and they beat them bad. By the way they made NBA basketball history while they were at it too.
To paraphrase:
"Ever since the NBA adopted the 2-3-2 format in the NBA Finals, no home team has ever swept the middle three games."
These Pistons did it after 48 minutes. Today they might go into the history books as one of the most remembered teams in the history of the NBA not because of the similarity they have with the Bad Boys of old or the fact that they helped bring all sports trophies in the Motor City for this year. They will go down as the only opponents strong enough to beat a Los Angeles Lakers team that seemed to don an armor of invincibility. They will be remembered for the way that they played basketball---as a team. Nobody stood out in the series. There was no single superstar in this Detroit team, no million dollar player who would be demanding the ball each and every possession. One could even argue that Ben Wallace is the heart and soul of this team, but it would be to no avail because it would only echo as much as a whisper lost in an arena full of screaming, rabid basketball fans. No one in this Detroit team would care because all the proof that they need, they already have.
Trophy love. How sweet it is, indeed!
The Detroit Pistons have never been my favorite team until the start of the NBA Finals. I never followed them as a basketball team because after all, I, too, fell for the notion that the Eastern Conference was the JV league of the NBA. But no matter how double-faced this article may be, after their win in Game 1 it only became apparent to me that the resolve of this team is iron-clad, that their casually talked-about defense actually makes the other team turn over the ball more. And today, basketball, as a sport, has never meant more to itself because the Pistons did the great James Naismith proud. In front of the whole world, these athletes exemplified how to play basketball. And their success came as no secret.
Defend the paint. Make your shots and just play ball.
Mind-boggling as how everything turned out to be, the spirit of the team was echoed in a simple comment that will be lost in the flood of interviews and championship jubilation:
"You've got to know that you're going to be in a fight for 40 minutes. You've just got to be willing to take some blows and just stand in there and play" -Ben Wallace
Indeed, the Los Angeles Lakers had a self-proclaimed superman on their side. But even Superman had friends. This Lakers team didn’t. The Detroit Pistons showed that anything is possible as long as you have the will to accomplish it. Moreover, they also taught us that it didn’t hurt to rely on each other when the hour of proving comes. The better team won this year. Next year will be no different.
I love this game.
by Zeus A. Martinez
Tuesday, June 15, 2004
In Memory of Lost Friends
In Memory of Lost Friends
Everytime we enter a new phase of our lives, we inevitably leave the friends we've made. Some of those friends we may still see from time to time while some we never see again.
Some of the ones that we still meet up with are brought about by convenience. They are our classmates, next-door neighbors, teachers and that steadfast circle of friends. They are either the people we cannot help but meet and greet everyday or the ones that we hold on to dear life. Barkadas will be the best example of the latter.
Our circle of friends, the select few who have gained access to our limited time and *ahem* indispensable companionship will always be the ones we talk with, the ones who we shares our interests with, and the ones that will always accept us no matter who we are and what we do.
But even they fade into the background, as all people do.
When we were intelligent enough to be sent to a school, most of us started in kindergarten school with other children. At that time, school seemed more like a blur. Like the first bolt of lightning in the darkening sky. Suddenly it was over and you had to move up to prepatory school. That, too, seemed more like a day in itself. You could only remember bits and pieces of conversation but the memories were definitely there. Then came gradeschool.
The hours were longer.
At that time you learned about oppurtunity costs without even being introduced to the idea. Yes, there were shows that you were going to miss...but the comfort of late-afternoon cartoons and eager playmates were there to welcome you home. All you knew was that you had to keep going. After all, "staying in school is the right thing to do" is what they said. Then your first graduation happened.
The next thing you know, you felt a sense of seniority in the campus. You came to school knowing that you were going to have a great time because there were a lot of new things that you were still getting used to. Suddenly "Math" was called Algebra, and "Science" was broken down into Biology and Chemistry. And you distinctly remember prom night. Whether it was one the finest days of your high school life or not, you couldn't forget that night.
Then came college. New subjects, new set of friends. Heck, you even got a new nickname. But as soon as you're ready to reflect on your life in a university, strange as it seems, that life is over. You try to make something out of the four years you've spent with your dearest friends and when looking back you say to yourself: "It's over?"
We leave a lot of memories behind whenever we move on to the next phase of our lives. And along with those memories, people are always forgotten or buried in that casket we call The Past. How many friends have you met and lost touch with during your stay here on this globe? How many more will be lost in the sea of your intertwining connections?
They are but mere raindrops lost in an ocean of people. Waiting to be found again.
Everytime we enter a new phase of our lives, we inevitably leave the friends we've made. Some of those friends we may still see from time to time while some we never see again.
Some of the ones that we still meet up with are brought about by convenience. They are our classmates, next-door neighbors, teachers and that steadfast circle of friends. They are either the people we cannot help but meet and greet everyday or the ones that we hold on to dear life. Barkadas will be the best example of the latter.
Our circle of friends, the select few who have gained access to our limited time and *ahem* indispensable companionship will always be the ones we talk with, the ones who we shares our interests with, and the ones that will always accept us no matter who we are and what we do.
But even they fade into the background, as all people do.
When we were intelligent enough to be sent to a school, most of us started in kindergarten school with other children. At that time, school seemed more like a blur. Like the first bolt of lightning in the darkening sky. Suddenly it was over and you had to move up to prepatory school. That, too, seemed more like a day in itself. You could only remember bits and pieces of conversation but the memories were definitely there. Then came gradeschool.
The hours were longer.
At that time you learned about oppurtunity costs without even being introduced to the idea. Yes, there were shows that you were going to miss...but the comfort of late-afternoon cartoons and eager playmates were there to welcome you home. All you knew was that you had to keep going. After all, "staying in school is the right thing to do" is what they said. Then your first graduation happened.
The next thing you know, you felt a sense of seniority in the campus. You came to school knowing that you were going to have a great time because there were a lot of new things that you were still getting used to. Suddenly "Math" was called Algebra, and "Science" was broken down into Biology and Chemistry. And you distinctly remember prom night. Whether it was one the finest days of your high school life or not, you couldn't forget that night.
Then came college. New subjects, new set of friends. Heck, you even got a new nickname. But as soon as you're ready to reflect on your life in a university, strange as it seems, that life is over. You try to make something out of the four years you've spent with your dearest friends and when looking back you say to yourself: "It's over?"
We leave a lot of memories behind whenever we move on to the next phase of our lives. And along with those memories, people are always forgotten or buried in that casket we call The Past. How many friends have you met and lost touch with during your stay here on this globe? How many more will be lost in the sea of your intertwining connections?
They are but mere raindrops lost in an ocean of people. Waiting to be found again.
Friday, June 11, 2004
It's late and I can't sleep again. Ah what the heck, let's just get on that bandwagon and stay on it for a while...
FALLEN
bySarah McLachlan
Heaven bent to take my hand
And lead me through the fire
Be the long awaited answer
To a long and painful fight
Truth be told I've tried my best
But somewhere along the way
I got caught up in all there was to offer
And the cost was so much more than I could bear
Though I've tried, I've fallen...
I have sunk so low
I have messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so...
We all begin with good intent
Love was raw and young
We believed that we could change ourselves
The past could be undone
But we carry on our backs the burden
Time always reveals
The lonely light of morning
The wound that would not heal
It's the bitter taste of losing everything
That I have held so dear.
I've fallen...
I have sunk so low
I have messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so...
Heaven bent to take my hand
Nowhere left to turn
I'm lost to those I thought were friends
To everyone I know
Oh they turned their heads embarassed
Pretend that they don't see
But it's one missed step
You'll slip before you know it
And there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed
Though I've tried, I've fallen...
I have sunk so low
I have messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so...
FALLEN
bySarah McLachlan
Heaven bent to take my hand
And lead me through the fire
Be the long awaited answer
To a long and painful fight
Truth be told I've tried my best
But somewhere along the way
I got caught up in all there was to offer
And the cost was so much more than I could bear
Though I've tried, I've fallen...
I have sunk so low
I have messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so...
We all begin with good intent
Love was raw and young
We believed that we could change ourselves
The past could be undone
But we carry on our backs the burden
Time always reveals
The lonely light of morning
The wound that would not heal
It's the bitter taste of losing everything
That I have held so dear.
I've fallen...
I have sunk so low
I have messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so...
Heaven bent to take my hand
Nowhere left to turn
I'm lost to those I thought were friends
To everyone I know
Oh they turned their heads embarassed
Pretend that they don't see
But it's one missed step
You'll slip before you know it
And there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed
Though I've tried, I've fallen...
I have sunk so low
I have messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so...
I think the song best describes what I'm feeling at the moment. It seems that I've failed too many times and lost so much. I need to escape.
Thursday, June 10, 2004
It's been a while since I last posted something. Guess I've been thinking again.
Being apart and lonely is like rain.
It climbs toward evening from the ocean plains;
from flat places, rolling and remote, it climbs
to heaven, which is its old abode.
And only when leaving heaven drops upon the city.
excerpt from "Loneliness" by Rainer Maria Rilke
Being apart and lonely is like rain.
It climbs toward evening from the ocean plains;
from flat places, rolling and remote, it climbs
to heaven, which is its old abode.
And only when leaving heaven drops upon the city.
excerpt from "Loneliness" by Rainer Maria Rilke
Thursday, June 03, 2004
Did you ever wonder what happened to that one good friend you had 10 years ago? He or she was probably a bestfriend but back then, all you knew was that the two of you had a special connection. One in which you could rely on. One day, you're basking in the comfort and security of your friendship and then you find yourself looking back at those times, wondering, where have they all gone?
Friendships seem so fragile nowadays. And I still can't understand why.
Are we going to go throughout our own lives meeting people only to forget how much they matter to us? It seems like the world today doesn't have much respect for the things that are really important. After all, we're all keeping ourselves busy with our hobbies, the most recent box-office hit, the latest fashion trends, our significant other and whatnot. Sometimes we do forget how to connect with the people who have touched our lives. And I don't blame these people. After all, I myself, am guilty of these things. I don't seek to condemn or criticize people who forget people. I just think there's something terribly wrong with it.
Friendships seem so fragile nowadays. And I still can't understand why.
Are we going to go throughout our own lives meeting people only to forget how much they matter to us? It seems like the world today doesn't have much respect for the things that are really important. After all, we're all keeping ourselves busy with our hobbies, the most recent box-office hit, the latest fashion trends, our significant other and whatnot. Sometimes we do forget how to connect with the people who have touched our lives. And I don't blame these people. After all, I myself, am guilty of these things. I don't seek to condemn or criticize people who forget people. I just think there's something terribly wrong with it.
Tuesday, June 01, 2004
There's nothing like the love for the game. I played 5 straight hours of basketball. Yes, you read it right. Five long hours of bumps, sweat and guts! (of course, it was all in good fun) Anj, A.J. and I started at around 6 PM and we finished at around 11:00 in the evening! It felt good to play that long just to take out all of the calories and fat that's been clinging on to my *ahem* abdomen. :) Man, that felt good!
There's no substitute for therapy than a good game. (which Anj and I incidentally won!) Can't wait to stretch these muscles again. Muscles? What muscles? :) Anyway, exercise has been very therapeutic for me indeed. In my opinion, more helpful than blogging although I won't object to that fact. :)
Come endorphins! Come to me!!!
There's no substitute for therapy than a good game. (which Anj and I incidentally won!) Can't wait to stretch these muscles again. Muscles? What muscles? :) Anyway, exercise has been very therapeutic for me indeed. In my opinion, more helpful than blogging although I won't object to that fact. :)
Come endorphins! Come to me!!!
Monday, May 31, 2004
For the first time in weeks, I've managed to sleep earlier than 3:00 AM.
It's so hard to get a good night's rest without the help of fatigue that comes from the office or even from moderate exercise. These past weeks have been such a blur to me I don't know where they went. Normally, I'd sleep at around 3-5 AM and I'd wake up at around 9:00 AM. It's very strange because I wouldn't be that tired in the morning but come afternoon, I tend to nap a few hours or so. Talk about sleep disorder.
But now, I've managed to sleep at 12:30 AM. Yes, for me that is already quite a feat. And to top it off, I slept until noon a few hours earlier. I should be up until the wee hours of the morning but I wasn't. I was actually...sleepy! It's difficult to understand how and why my body clock adjusted itself but I'm just glad I was able to sleep well last night. :) Ahhh yes, I can watch the NBA Playoffs without having to doze off during commercials. What bliss. Let's go Detroit!
Always look on the bright side of life...
It's so hard to get a good night's rest without the help of fatigue that comes from the office or even from moderate exercise. These past weeks have been such a blur to me I don't know where they went. Normally, I'd sleep at around 3-5 AM and I'd wake up at around 9:00 AM. It's very strange because I wouldn't be that tired in the morning but come afternoon, I tend to nap a few hours or so. Talk about sleep disorder.
But now, I've managed to sleep at 12:30 AM. Yes, for me that is already quite a feat. And to top it off, I slept until noon a few hours earlier. I should be up until the wee hours of the morning but I wasn't. I was actually...sleepy! It's difficult to understand how and why my body clock adjusted itself but I'm just glad I was able to sleep well last night. :) Ahhh yes, I can watch the NBA Playoffs without having to doze off during commercials. What bliss. Let's go Detroit!
Always look on the bright side of life...
Saturday, May 29, 2004
Noypi
by Bamboo of Rivermaya
Tingnan mo ang iyong palad
Kalyado mong kamay
Sa hirap ng buhay
Sa dami mong problema
Nakuha mo pang ngumiti
Noypi ka nga. Astig!
Saan ka man naroroon, wag kang matatakot sa baril o patalim
Sa bakas na madilim
Hoy pinoy ako
Buo aking loob, may agimat ang dugo ko
Sinisid ko ang dagat
Nilibot ko ang mundo
Nasa puso ko pala and hinahanap kong kulo
Ilang beses nakong muntikang mamatay
Alam ko ang sekreto kaya't nandito pa't buhay
Sabi nila may anting-anting ako
pero di nila alam na Diyos and dahilan ko
Hoy pinoy ako
Buo aking loob, may agimat ang dugo ko
Dinig mo ba ang bulong ng lahi mo
Isigaw mo kapatid ang himig natin
I am proud to be a Filipino.
No matter how ironic or hypocritical this post may be, (being written in English) I still stand by what I said. I am proud to be a Filipino. I think there are a considerable number of pinoys out there who wouldn't be able to say the same. Why would they? The country is one of the most corrupt in Southeast Asia, the peso has fallen to an all-time low, life is hard and essentially, the Philippines has never seen a worse time that what we're experiencing right now. We rarely trust people anymore and that's because we're always being lied to and robbed by our own countrymen be it the President or just a lowly desperate man who needs to feed his family for the week. ¤sigh¤
Yes, I concede that there's nothing much to be proud of such acts. One could reason that other countries do much much worse. One could argue that the crime and corruption that happens in our neighboring countries far surpasses that which we experience here in our Motherland. But we are not them, and they, not us. That is what we should we remember.
We could be much better that who we are now. We could learn how to follow rules and respect authority. And those authorities could also not take advantage of people in any manner. We could help people rise above their troubles and fears just a little bit by acknowledging that he is also fighting his own war against poverty, despair and self-pity...and that he is also our brother.
We could be more than who we are now. The question is, will we choose to be that kind of person?
